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The NVC Model: A Map to Your Intentions

Article • 4 - 6 minutes • 4/2014
Beginner Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes
4/2014

The more we practice NVC by “rote” --going through OFNR (“Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests”) on automatic-- the more likely our NVC practice would lead to disconnection.  The purpose of our NVC practice is to use this NVC "map" (OFNR) to support us in integrating the consciousness of the NVC (eg. operating with the intention to connect, collaborate, etc).  Once we let the map drop away, we can engage with the people in our lives in a more heartfelt way.  This article explains more about how we can use the map to remind us of our  heartfelt consciousness...


Experiencing Gratitude

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 04/15/2005
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
04/15/2005

Trainer Tip: Do you ever think you’re taking life just a little too seriously? Many of us work hard trying to improve our outlook, our ability to communicate, and our lives. Sometimes we work so hard, we forget to enjoy life. So let’s make a pact to enjoy our day.


Blame, Responsibility, And Care

Article • 11 - 16 minutes • 09/15/2022
Advanced Skill Level
Article
11 - 16 minutes
09/15/2022
One NVC principle is "stimulus vs cause" - one may be the stimulus but never the cause of another's feelings. When we're upset this principle can help us express pain without blame. However, when others are upset it's easy to slip into blaming them using this principle. Instead, we can hear their pain with care and heartfelt mourning - without guilt nor defensiveness, and whether or not we agree. All this is important if we're sincerely applying compassion. Read on for more.

Five Core Principles of Living Compassion and the Relationship of Needs to Spirituality

Audio • 8 minutes • 10/09/2013
Beginner Skill Level
Audio
8 minutes
10/09/2013

Listen to Robert describe the five core principles of Living Compassion and the relationship of needs to spirituality. Great material for reflection and reference!


Valuing Everyone’s Needs

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005

Trainer tip: If you are in a relationship (whether personal or work related) that you are not happy with, consider talking to the other person in an effort to connect about both your needs. Talking about it doesn’t guarantee that you will like the resolution, but not talking about it guarantees continued unhappiness. Read on for more.


When We Need Empathy the Most

Trainer Tip • 1-2 minutes • 10/2005
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1-2 minutes
10/2005

Trainer Tip: On a scale of 1 to 10, how is your emotional bank account? If it’s lower than you like, consider what you can do right now to bring it closer to balance. Everyone in your life, and most especially you, will benefit from this. Even 15 mins of empathy may nourish you with accompaniment and perspective, even when the issues or circumstances in your life are the same.


Observation: The Awareness of the Thoughts, Stories and Core Beliefs to Enhance Connection

Audio • 2 hours, 10 minutes • 06/2010
Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
2 hours, 10 minutes
06/2010

In this recorded telecourse, John Kinyon, world renowned CNVC Certified Trainer, guides you through processes to strengthen your capacity for mindful presence and awareness of your thinking, and to develop the skills to translate thoughts into observations.


Needs-Based Negotiation: 3 Stages Of Dialogue And 3 Types Of Reactivity

Practice Exercise • 6 - 9 minutes • 03/02/2022
Intermediate Skill Level
Practice Exercise
6 - 9 minutes
03/02/2022

When there's quality connection then collaboration and creativity generosity of heart can come. Then strategies honoring everyone’s needs are easier. This requires us to trust connection, hear needs, brainstorm, experiment, prepare, and hold confidence that everyone’s needs can be met. Needs-based negotiation starts there. What derails this? Feeling urgency, listening from our (dis)likes or opinions, and dire predictions.


Expressing Our Pain Without Blame

Article • 4 - 6 minutes • 08/2011
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes
08/2011

The more we can stay present with our hurt, and own our interpretations, we are more likely to express what's important to us without blame and also to become resilient. From there, the listener can have more space to offer their full presence and empathy. Read on for more.


Become Willing to Express Appreciation

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005

Trainer Tip: If someone has enriched your life (or moment) in some way, consider telling them about it. Your appreciation might be just the gift they need to contribute to brightening their day.


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