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Dealing With Disappointment

Article • 3 - 5 minutes • 12/4/2021
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3 - 5 minutes
12/4/2021

Disappointment emerges when there is a gap between what we want, expect or hope for, and what is happening. When this occurs it can be tempting to make someone or the situation wrong. Instead, rather than pushing against the flow of life we can rejoin it, non-judgmentally notice our observations and feelings. Plus we can nurture acceptance and mourning. We can also remember that what's happening isn't permanent.


The Spiral Blend

Video • 15 minutes • 10/01/2017
Intermediate Skill Level
Video
15 minutes
10/01/2017

David explores how movement helps you hold your center when navigating challenging conversations. Example: Move to Wind ~ to calm your system; Move to Ground ~ to notice the ground on which you stand; and Step to Shikaku ~ step behind to practice empathic listening. Listen Now.


Defining Needs

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005

In NVC we define needs as resources that life requires to sustain itself. All human beings have the same needs. The strategy is what we do to meet that need. Strategies are specific; we all choose unique ways to meet our needs. The more we can see the difference between the two, the more likely we are to resolve conflicts with ease. Today, look for opportunities to notice the difference in the given situation.


Working With Our Mixed “Yes”

Practice Exercise • 1-2 minutes • 1/29/2022
Beginner Skill Level
Practice Exercise
1-2 minutes
1/29/2022

For this exercise choose a situation in which you have said a “yes” to someone‛s request but you didn't experience your “yes” as given freely or joyfully. Then explore judgements, feelings, needs, and alternate strategies that come up in relation to your “yes”, your “no”, and in relation to what the other person might be experiencing.


Responding to Opportunity in Extreme Times

Article • 12 - 18 minutes • 04/2020
All Skill Levels
Article
12 - 18 minutes
04/2020

This pandemic is an immense opportunity, and a dire catastrophe in the making. It’s a crisis within many planetary crises — during which, our habits as individuals, and as a collective, are challenged because they don’t sustain us. Now we are pushed to respond freshly and join forces in ways that seemed impossible before.


The Living Energy of Needs

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Video • 32 minutes • 10/2007
Intermediate Skill Level
Video
32 minutes
10/2007

In this interactive video, Susan Skye helps you unlearn existing, negative associations with the term "needs" to instead build a new association grounded in your natural state of compassion.


Overcoming Insecurity in Friendships

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005

Instead of wondering, invest time today to ask at least one friend your friendship enhances her life. Such clarification can deepen the connection.


From Blame To Power

Practice Exercise • 12 -18 minutes • 02/19/2022
Intermediate Skill Level
Practice Exercise
12 -18 minutes
02/19/2022
Blame is opaque when we don’t reflect on it deeply. We blame when we don’t see ourselves as having power to shape things, and see others as the ones who can. Blame and how we respond to it, is both a symptom of inability to step into power, and an impediment to empowered relationships. Transforming blame requires self-responsibility. Read on for practices involving empathy, inner connection, power, preparation and engaging options.

The Power of Authenticity + Care

Article • 9 - 13 minutes • 04/2019
All Skill Levels
Article
9 - 13 minutes
04/2019

When we're on the receiving end of pain-stimulating assumptions, a microaggression, or prejudice --when we're reactive and resultingly have self-doubt, guilt or shame in ourselves-- is it possible to be intensely authentic while holding care for everyone in the situation? Can we effectively do this even as a third party witnesses to these things? Self-empathy, empathy, and a commitment to authenticity have become essential tools I need to keep sharpened in my toolbox if I am to show up and do the work I value in this world.


Exercise For Saying "No" And Staying Connected

Practice Exercise • 1 - 2 minutes • 12/23/2021
Beginner Skill Level
Practice Exercise
1 - 2 minutes
12/23/2021

Ever have a hard time saying "no" to someone, or feel obligated to say yes? Here's an exercise that can help you notice where you are placing yourself as someone who "has to" say yes; the needs in the other person making the request; what you want to say "yes" to (regarding your needs and theirs) by saying "no"; what prevents you from saying "yes"; plus your request and how you might express it.


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