Trainer Tip: Q: How do we get the love we want? A: Ask for it. Trainer Tip Life itself is the proper binge.—Julia Child Several years ago, when I visited my parents, my mother bought candy as a welcoming gift for me. I was trying to avoid sugar, so I felt annoyed by this. After one of these visits, the thought came to me that she bought candy to express her love. What if I created a new way for her to express it that felt better to me? The next time I went home, Mom offered me candy. When I said no, she looked disappointed. So I said, “You know what I could really use, Mom, is new underwear. How would you feel about buying me new underwear?” She was delighted. Her face lit up and she said, “Oh, yes. Let’s go shopping right now!” She ran and got her coat and purse and we were on our way. While we were at the mall, we picked up a few things for her, we had lunch, and we talked and laughed. It turned out to be a very sweet day. Could I buy my own underwear? Yes, of course. I was 35 years old at the time. But my mother adores me, she wants to contribute to my life, and I really did need new underwear. At first I felt a little embarrassed having her buy my underwear, but then I saw the sheer joy in her face. We are a gift to the people who love us. Sometimes we need to help them find ways to express their love to us. It would be such a shame if we didn’t give them opportunities to meet their need to contribute to our life! Be aware today of people who are trying to expresstheir love to you, and help them do this in waysthat bring pleasure to you both. This trainer tip is an excerpt from Mary Mackenzie's book Peaceful Living, available from PuddleDancer Press.