Empathy Hurdles

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 2 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
2 pages
Miki Kashtan poignantly shares about the challenges of empathizing with another when we really don't understand their actions.

Moving From Blame to Self-Responsibility

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 2 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
2 pages
Often when someone else does something we don't like, it's easy to blame the other person. After all, we have all been trained to focus on fault when needs are not met. What can we do to shift that pattern?

Vulnerability as a Spiritual Path

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 3 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3 pages
What is a good baby? If you have been raised in a Western culture, chances are you know the answer right away (whether or not you agree with it). A good baby is one that doesn't cry! The training against vulnerability starts very early in life.

Healing the Blame that Binds

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 3 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3 pages
Blame is the game that protects me from the understanding that the cause of all my emotional distress, fear, shame and guilt comes from the part of me I call "the inner voice."

The Price of Nice

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 8 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
8 pages
Have you been nice? Well then you must be enjoying the reward: depression, intermittent explosiveness, job meaninglessness, ambiguous anxiety, low resentment and subtle self hate.

The Freedom of Committing to a Path

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 3 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3 pages
In June, 1996, I had an epiphany. In a motel room in Indiana, the night before returning home from a solo camping trip in Michigan and Canada, I discovered how much I had lost in my life because of so fiercely protecting myself. Up until that day, bringing forth my vulnerable self was to be avoided at all costs, which kept me numb much of the time, disconnected from myself and from much of life. Alone in my room, I cried, I talked out loud, and I finally exclaimed to myself that I wanted to reclaim every last bit of my vulnerability, just like I had it as a child.

Is NVC Always, in the End, “Just One-on-One”?

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 3 pages
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
3 pages
Ask the Trainer: "Can you share stories of transforming group conflict, or is NVC strictly intended for 'one-on-one' work?"

An NVC “Do-Over”

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 1 page
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 page
Trainer Tip: When we respond in a way that is less than our ideal in terms of using NVC, we don't have to give up and think we are no good at NVC or that NVC doesn't work!

The Cause of Our Feelings

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 3 pages
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
3 pages
Ask the Trainer: “I would love some clarity about the NVC perspective on the cause of our feelings. It seems to me that my needs may be met or not, but the cause of my painful feelings is my story around the situation.”

Understanding I’m Not Responsible for Another's Feelings

with
Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 2 pages
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 pages
Ask the Trainer: "I understand that I'm not responsible for someone else's feelings, but my girlfriend doesn't. Do you have ideas for how I could get her to understand this concept?"

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