NVC Library

Five Tips For Reading The News Without Losing It

Beginner Skill Level • Article • Read Time: 5 - 8 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
Read Time: 5 - 8 minutes
Is it dangerous for large numbers of people to be absorbing disturbing news alone? Given the intensity of our times, making choices based on conscious awareness and discernment in relation to current events is essential for our ability to stay engaged, and to also wisely meet our collective challenges with agency and power. Here are five tips for how to help stay sane in relation to the news cycle.

Appreciation vs. Approval, Compliments or Praise

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • Read time: 1-2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: When we acknowledge our met needs, rather than labeling the other person as good or bad, we achieve a clarity of mind that deepens our connection to ourselves and other people.

What About Psychopaths?

Beginner Skill Level • Article • Read Time: 4 - 6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
Read Time: 4 - 6 minutes
Sometimes we want to avoid placing our love and trust in someone, to protect our hearts and our life energies. And so there are deeper questions that we can use to check whether we're in relationship with someone who doesn't have capacity to be in relationship with us (eg. “Do I have a sense of mattering in this relationship?”). Read on for more questions we use to assess our empathy and efforts in relationships.

Empathy Buddy Guidelines

Beginner Skill Level • Article • Read time: 2 - 3 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
Read time: 2 - 3 minutes
Here are some guidelines and agreements for creating empathy buddy sessions. Includes a list of blocks to empathy.

Engage Your Curiosity

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • Read time: 1-2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: When someone acts in baffling ways we can either wonder about what’s going on with the other person, create our own stories about it (blame, resent, make assumptions), or inform ourselves by asking. This is an opportunity to learn something new.

Social Dynamics During the Holidays

Intermediate Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
During the holiday season we may find ourselves taking responsibility for other's feelings, which can lead to guilt, shame, depression, and resentment. These feelings are exacerbated by the habitual pattern we call the "Vortex of Submission" (being hooked by a sense of duty and obligation). Read on for ways to recognize and break the pattern.

Needs-Based Negotiation

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • Read time: 1-2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: When we create situations that value one person’s needs at the expense of another, we open the door for someone to lose. Instead, look to see if you can speak openly and honestly, value the other person’s needs, and create solutions that value all stakeholder needs.

Some Ideas for Using the Feelings & Needs Cards

Beginner Skill Level • Practice Exercise • Read time: 4 - 6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Practice Exercise
Read time: 4 - 6 minutes
This guide features three activities that use feelings and needs cards: two verions of "Feelings and Needs Poker" and one for "Self-Empathy". Great for practicing alone, with a partner, or in a group.

Meeting Our Need for Support

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • Read time: 1-2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: Asking for support may feel awkward and uncomfortable. In these moments, we may forget that everyone needs support. We may also forget that there may be many options available to us, even if what's available isn't our preferred source of support.

Starting the Future Today

All Skill Levels • Article • Read time: 6 - 9 minutes
All Skill Levels
Article
Read time: 6 - 9 minutes
We can dream and wait for the day to do things differently, or we can continually take steps towards the future of our dreams as though it were here now. The future will not be significantly different from the present if we all act as if change is not possible or only possible after it's already happened. Instead, we can immediately consider everything we do as the possible seed of change beyond our wildest dreams and vision.

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