NVC Multimedia Library

Articles (53)

Transforming Painful Patterns

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 7 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
7 pages
Why is it so difficult to change our patterns even when we want to, even when we experience shame or despair about them? Here are common pitfalls and concrete steps to overcome them in the future.

Connection Requests: Motivations and Examples Article

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 5 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
5 pages
Connection requests focus on the quality of connection between people instead of on any particular strategy or solution.

It Takes a Community to Raise a Relationship

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 4 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
4 pages
Using his own life experience, Eric explores why we need support from others, what support might look like, and what blocks us from asking for support for our relationships.

Celebrating Mourning

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 2 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
2 pages
On a recent vacation in a Mexican village, I was surprised to find myself in the midst of a community in mourning. Two days before I came, a 21-year-old girl the entire town knew had died in a car accident.

The Price of Nice

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 8 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
8 pages
Have you been nice? Well then you must be enjoying the reward: depression, intermittent explosiveness, job meaninglessness, ambiguous anxiety, low resentment and subtle self hate.

What’s Important to You?

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 2 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
2 pages
This exercise is most often the first activity in a beginning level workshop after the usual logistics/history/check-in. Penny Wassman experiences it as an opportunity for people to build connection with one another.

Where Do Jackal Voices Come From?

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 4 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
4 pages
CNVC Certified Trainer Stephanie Bachmann Mattei explores the biological basis of our inner jackal voices.

Moving From Blame to Self-Responsibility

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 2 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
2 pages
Often when someone else does something we don't like, it's easy to blame the other person. After all, we have all been trained to focus on fault when needs are not met. What can we do to shift that pattern?

Vulnerability as a Spiritual Path

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 3 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3 pages
What is a good baby? If you have been raised in a Western culture, chances are you know the answer right away (whether or not you agree with it). A good baby is one that doesn't cry! The training against vulnerability starts very early in…

Healing the Blame that Binds

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 3 pages
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3 pages
Blame is the game that protects me from the understanding that the cause of all my emotional distress, fear, shame and guilt comes from the part of me I call "the inner voice."

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