Library Resources with Beginner Skill Level

Trainer Tip: Sometimes we need to empathize with a person before he can hear our anger. Consider that all anger is an expression of an unmet need. If we focus on the need, rather than the actions, we are more likely to connect compassionately with other people. Be aware of opportunities to empathize with someone’s anger today.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 1-2 minutes
  • Production Date 10/2005
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips
Unhook from a reactive dynamic, by staying with your needs and requests, and release attachment to outcome. Start by shifting your attention from the other person to get clear on what's true for you. Read on for strategies to transform reactivity, possible boundary setting behaviors, typical signs of escalation, and more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 8-12 minutes
  • Production Date 11/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 6
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
The “mind” or our “ego” are often depicted as a static entity, an unchangable part of human nature, and as obstacles or negative parts of ourselves to overcome. This view creates maligning, a split within us, while remaining invisibly part and parcel of authority-based societies --the dominant culture and institutions into which we are born. Instead, I want to advocate an integration of reason and emotion, mind and heart, plus self and others.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level All Skill Levels
  • Duration Read time: 10 - 15 minutes
  • Production Date 11/2013
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 8
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
One clue we have trauma is when we respond in a way we don't want (eg. being reactive, self sabotaging, etc). Even when we have high level NVC skills our trauma-related mechanisms can activate, and we can lose access to well honed NVC skills. Read on for approaches that involve healing trauma, and approaches that involve managing the effects of trauma and preventing additional trauma.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level All Skill Levels
  • Duration Read time: 3 - 5 minutes
  • Production Date 11/2009
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Trainer Tip: Acknowledge that the person’s life has been affected by your actions and enjoy the feeling of warmth you have when you contribute to a life. Try verbally acknowledging how you feel when you hear that you have enhanced her life.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 1-2 minutes
  • Production Date 10/2005
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips
Reducing overwhelm requires you to reconnect with your authentic choice, be present and compassionate with what's happening, heal trauma, and interrupt the trauma response. Read on for ways that may help you reconnect with your choice, presence and more on trauma.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 3-5 minutes
  • Production Date 11/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Trainer Tip: List specific things that would signify love to you. Based on who the other person is and who you are, how could your need for love be met? Being specific is important. General statements, such as “I just want you to love me” or “I would like you to be more attentive and listen to me more” won’t work. (S)he may already think (s)he is attentive. What would being attentive look like to you? And how will he know if (s)he’s been attentive enough?

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 1-2 minutes
  • Production Date 10/2005
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips
Why is it so difficult to not take things personally? It's because everything reinforces the sense that whatever is being said is indeed about us – both from without and from within. However, we can get better at not taking things personally with a practice of shifting our focus by being open to multiple interpretations, understanding that our reaction is about our own need, and noticing how the other person’s words, no matter how they sound to us, are an expression of their needs. We can then be more present and available to navigate the situation.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 12 - 18 minutes
  • Production Date 02/2013
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 8
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Join Eric, as he reveals a clear path from heartbreaking intimate relationships to joyful, thriving intimate relationships. Eric uses his passion for helping singles heal from their past relationships, to help you to experience more ease, joy and mutuality in future relationships.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration 45 minutes
  • Production Date 10/9/2012
  • Premium Members Premium Members
  • Points 3
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Audio
Print-and-cut these 71 needs cards for one-on-one, partner or group activities, to help support the pratice of empathy. Includes nine blank cards for you to customize.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 1 - 2 minutes
  • Production Date 1/2010
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 9
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Learning Tools
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