Library Resources with LaShelle

Using the example of being met with chronic lateness, here are three steps to setting boundaries early in a dating situation or relationship.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 5-8 minutes
  • Production Date 12/2017
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 4
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
In the face of stress you can find ways to be present for what’s happening, rather than being pulled or pushed around by anxious thoughts or fearful feelings. Here are some strategies to return to and maintain expanded awareness.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level All Skill Levels
  • Duration Read time: 2-3 minutes
  • Production Date 04/2020
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
As social beings we thrive with social contact and community. Thus, with the social isolation and a loss of routine that happens in a pandemic, there are three critical areas to keep in mind everyday: emotional-physiological regulation, self-empathy for fear and anxiety, and meaningful engagement. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level All Skill Levels
  • Duration Read time: 5-8 minutes
  • Production Date 03/2020
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 6
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
When someone wants to speak angrily about another, do you want to move away, try to calm them, argue, set a boundary, or offer empathy? What supports you to stay self connected? You can set boundaries regarding listening so that you're less likely to defend the other party, or attempt to talk your friend down from their judgments, thereby escalating the situation. Disagreements can also ignite curiosity and celebration. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 5-8 minutes
  • Production Date 05/2018
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 4
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
This handout defines and contrasts "empathy" alongside "responses may meet needs, but are not empathy" (such as advice, correcting, consoling, etc).

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 2 - 3 minutes
  • Production Date 6/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Learning Tools
Here are 16 helpful requests you can make before you're swept up in your own reactivity.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 3-5 minutes
  • Production Date 05/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Unhook from a reactive dynamic, by staying with your needs and requests, and release attachment to outcome. Start by shifting your attention from the other person to get clear on what's true for you. Read on for strategies to transform reactivity, possible boundary setting behaviors, typical signs of escalation, and more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 8-12 minutes
  • Production Date 11/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 6
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Reducing overwhelm requires you to reconnect with your authentic choice, be present and compassionate with what's happening, heal trauma, and interrupt the trauma response. Read on for ways that may help you reconnect with your choice, presence and more on trauma.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 3-5 minutes
  • Production Date 11/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Most reactivity in intimate relationships comes from a lack of confidence in maintaining intimacy, autonomy, or security. What may help is naming what's happening, interrupting shame, and anchoring or reassuring yourself. You can also reflect on the effects of acting from reactivity. Knowing what helps center you, ask your partner to do or say specific things that might help. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 3-5 minutes
  • Production Date 2/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 4
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
In healing reactivity try identifying your most common complaints, wishes, or requests. Or when you tend to defend, justify, get angry, or protect. Find the tender needs. You can recall when you experienced deep nourishment of that need. Several times a week nourish your tender needs. Be clear about the strategy to address needs by answering key questions. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 3-5 minutes
  • Production Date 6/2018
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
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