Library Resources with conflict

Trainer Tip: Here are some options for tense moments in conversations: try a "redo", understand and recognize your habits, pause to regroup, empathize with the person so they feel heard, check your mind frame before speaking, and name some appreciations about one another.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 2 - 3 minutes
  • Production Date 4/2020
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips
When bullying occurs, if we do our own healing, our brains can become more sharp and present and willing to take action to connect and to begin to shift and mitigate the harm that trauma does in our world. We can reduce trauma inflicted upon others when we recognize the patterns of abuse and bullying, hold zero tolerance for it, bring in support for both sides of the conflict, and take action to effect systemic change. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration Read Time: 6 - 9 minutes
  • Production Date 04/2013
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
In order to bring in more nonviolence into the world, we need to take our own needs seriously and recognize that no amount of seeing someone’s innocence would mean putting up with more of their harmful behavior. We need to disentangle compassion towards another from the willingness to tolerate more harmful actions. At times this means finding enough self-love, support, or clarity, to take decisive action. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Levels
  • Duration Read time: 8 - 12 minutes
  • Production Date 03/2012
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 6
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
When conflict or criticism occurs, we can notice two layers of meaning to create connection: the content and the needs the speaker is holding. When we are able to recognize this --and ideally engage open-heartedly, with curiosity, make clear requests, imagining what they want, no matter how their expression was framed -- we have more opportunity to support the longevity of our relationships, and to decrease our loneliness when together.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 5 - 7 minutes
  • Production Date 05/2020
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 4
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Trainer tip: If you are in a relationship (whether personal or work related) that you are not happy with, consider talking to the other person in an effort to connect about both your needs. Talking about it doesn’t guarantee that you will like the resolution, but not talking about it guarantees continued unhappiness. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 1-2 minutes
  • Production Date 10/2005
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips
When someone expresses upset about our actions, and we focus on our intention being seen and understood (e.g. "I didn’t mean to hurt you”) it doesn't support the speaker in being heard more deeply with care. Here we'll explore this dynamic in a way that supports more clarity and the possibility of greater personal liberation. Read on for more.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Advanced Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 12 - 18 minutes
  • Production Date 08/2013
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 8
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Mid-conversation you may find yourself sliding into defending, shutting down, attacking, or blaming. Here's a list of possible emergency interventions that can help slow down escalation and return you to connection.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 2-3 minutes
  • Production Date 11/2019
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
The less blame and criticism, the easier it is for others to hear us. From this perspective, it’s in our best interest to come from curiosity and care. This way differences can bring us together and help us know one another. The more mutual understanding, the easier it is to work together and find creative solutions. Read on for more on this, with a story about how a black man inspired 200 members of the KKK to leave the organization.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration N/A
  • Production Date 1/2010
  • Premium Members Premium Members
  • Points 1
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Using the example of being met with chronic lateness, here are three steps to setting boundaries early in a dating situation or relationship.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 5-8 minutes
  • Production Date 12/2017
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 4
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles
Trainer Tip: If you make a specific and doable request as soon as you notice your needs, you'll have a better possibility of getting them met. It's also more likely your request will support the other person to contribute to your life. Make at least one specific, doable request of someone today as soon as you notice your needs.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration Read time: 1-2 minutes
  • Production Date 10/2005
  • Premium Members N/A
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips
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