Library Resources with honest expression

Join CNVC Certified Trainers Jori and Jim Manske in an exploration of how gratitude can enable you to remain more present moment to moment, thus enabling you to flourish in your life!

When someone's behavior costs us, we may attempt to negotiate as much as possible. After some rounds of this, if there's no change we may reach a tolerance limit. So we may set a boundary for self care and clarity about what's unworkable. But depending on intentions and the way its said, this may or may not be a punishment to get even. Here, clarity about intentions, feelings, needs, actions and dialogue may support us.

Sharing more vulnerably provides opportunities for fulfilling connection. As social beings we rely on feedback to see our effect on others. We can get that feedback through body language, facial cues and words. To expand your capacity to share more vulnerably you can create supportive conditions and timing. You can ask for feedback by making in-the-moment requests of others and yourself before and after you share.

Trainer tip: Feelings of hurt, anger, fear, and resentment can often sound alike. Fear and excitement have the same physiological effects on us, and are often expressed in the same body language. Clearly and specifically naming our emotions and the intensity level can help us resolve conflicts, with a much greater opportunity to get our needs met.

Trainer Tip: Many of us are afraid of our anger because we haven’t learned how to express it in a way that brings relief or that helps us meet our needs in the situation. Consider a different approach to anger, one that helps you fully express your anger and is more likely to help you meet your needs for relief, to be heard, or to be understood.

Trainer Tip: Mary shares an experience about accepting responsibility for her actions and how that lead her to greater choice and freedom.

Trainer Tip: Using NVC as a tool to transform our judgments can revolutionize our perceptions and relationships.

Trainer Tip: Sometimes the best way to get our need me is to first connect with the needs of another.

Trainer Tip: We can expand our connection to humanity by considering the many strategies people use to meet our common needs.

Trainer Tip: Anger is a prominent call to gain our attention. Mary explains why it's worth heeding that call.