In the Spotlight: Parenting

NVC and ParentingNVC shares two key premises with attachment parenting: Human actions are motivated by attempts to meet needs, and trusting relationships are built through attentiveness to those needs. Both premises contrast with prevailing childrearing practices and with the assumptions about human beings that underlie these practices. Instead of focusing on authority and discipline, attachment parenting and NVC provide theoretical and practical grounds for nurturing compassionate, powerful, and creative children who will have resources to contribute to a peaceful society.

Marshall Rosenberg, founder and education director of the Center for Nonviolent Communication, asks parents two questions to point out the severe limitations of using power-over tactics such as reward and punishment: “What do you want the child to do?” and “What do you want the child’s reasons to be for doing so?” Do we really want our child to do something out of fear? Guilt? Shame? Obligation? Desire for reward? While helping us meet our needs without coercion, NVC also helps us resist giving in to our children’s every wish by teaching us to express our feelings, needs, and requests clearly, and to expect our needs to be considered. When we consistently express our commitment to attending to everyone’s needs–not just theirs, not just our own–we model a way of life to our children and create power with them: the power of choosing to contribute to making life more wonderful for everyone.

Listen now to part 1 of Bringing Peace to Kids in Conflict with John Kinyon and Stephanie Bachmann Mattei just below.

Plus, check out our two new parenting courses. Connected Based Parenting with Ian Peatey and Monica Reu is a self-paced parenting course with a collaborative approach rooted in awareness and presence. Parenting without Obedience: An Introduction to Intergenerational Collaboration with Miki Kashtan, Arnina Kashtan and Lisa Rothman is a live videoconference founded on the principle of creating relationship in which both your needs and those of your children are fully included.

 

Kathleen Macferran

Kathleen Macferran

CNVC Certified Trainer from Bainbridge Island, Washington, USA

Kathleen Macferran is a CNVC Certified Trainer and offers Nonviolent Communication (NVC) training to schools, community groups, churches, hospitals, families, correctional officers and prison inmates. She is one of the trainers for the Freedom Project, an organization that strengthens our community through supporting the transformation of prisoners into peacemakers. In addition to working with the Center for Nonviolent Communication (CNVC), Kathleen  was the music director for the Rainier Chamber Winds for 16 years. Kathleen views the music ensemble as a wonderful metaphor for social organization since the wellbeing of one individual clearly depends on the wellbeing of all.

Kathleen offers training in concrete skills of nonviolence leading to reconciliation with ourselves, our loved ones and the community.

Website: Strength of Connection

To see Kathleen's TEDx talk on creating safety in our communities through connection: Click here

NVC Library Resources with Kathleen Macferran

Ten years of sharing NVC in Washington State prisons has deepened Kathleen Macferrans's conviction that nonviolence is truly a soul force—a force that transforms any heart touched by its clarity and power. Katheleen shares some stories when tensions ran high in prison workshops, and a fierce holding of how the NVC process helped us navigate. Kathleen explores how to support you in moving through your challenging situations with more clarity and grace.
How do we deal with ourselves when we're less than perfect? Listen in as Kathleen guides you through a 6-step exercise in empathic presence based on Marshall Rosenberg's Self-Empathy process.
In this thought provoking talk, Kathleen Macferran explores the power of listening to open doors and potentially to transform people. This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences.

Join Kathleen for a gentle, compassionate exploration and embracing of your true self. Reclaim your self-worth, experience greater freedom when expressing your self and actually celebrate who you are in the world.  Delve into what self-love is and is not – including how to distinguish self-worth from negative cultural labels such as self-obsession and selfishness.

The first session of this course is available for all to listen to and enjoy.

Are we really safer when we put those who harm others behind bars and forget about them? Explore turning our prisons into houses of healing and creating connections that lead to greater safety for our communities.
This telecourse recording is for anyone wanting to integrate empathy into his/her life in a more natural, authentic way.
This telecourse recording is for anyone wanting to integrate empathy into his/her life in a more natural, authentic way.
This telecourse recording is for anyone wanting to integrate empathy into his/her life in a more natural, authentic way.
This telecourse recording is for anyone wanting to integrate empathy into his/her life in a more natural, authentic way.
CNVC Certified Trainer Kathleen Macferran introduces us to Nonviolent Communication through three different learning tracks: Classic NVC, Practical NVC and Youth Oriented NVC. This course is complete with video examples and loads of practice exercises-- a great way to start learning NVC, or as a refresher if you've already begun.
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