In the Spotlight: Parenting

NVC and ParentingNVC shares two key premises with attachment parenting: Human actions are motivated by attempts to meet needs, and trusting relationships are built through attentiveness to those needs. Both premises contrast with prevailing childrearing practices and with the assumptions about human beings that underlie these practices. Instead of focusing on authority and discipline, attachment parenting and NVC provide theoretical and practical grounds for nurturing compassionate, powerful, and creative children who will have resources to contribute to a peaceful society.

Marshall Rosenberg, founder and education director of the Center for Nonviolent Communication, asks parents two questions to point out the severe limitations of using power-over tactics such as reward and punishment: “What do you want the child to do?” and “What do you want the child’s reasons to be for doing so?” Do we really want our child to do something out of fear? Guilt? Shame? Obligation? Desire for reward? While helping us meet our needs without coercion, NVC also helps us resist giving in to our children’s every wish by teaching us to express our feelings, needs, and requests clearly, and to expect our needs to be considered. When we consistently express our commitment to attending to everyone’s needs–not just theirs, not just our own–we model a way of life to our children and create power with them: the power of choosing to contribute to making life more wonderful for everyone.

Listen now to part 1 of Bringing Peace to Kids in Conflict with John Kinyon and Stephanie Bachmann Mattei just below.

Plus, check out our two new parenting courses. Connected Based Parenting with Ian Peatey and Monica Reu is a self-paced parenting course with a collaborative approach rooted in awareness and presence. Parenting without Obedience: An Introduction to Intergenerational Collaboration with Miki Kashtan, Arnina Kashtan and Lisa Rothman is a live videoconference founded on the principle of creating relationship in which both your needs and those of your children are fully included.

 

Jim & Jori Manske

Jim & Jori Manske

CNVC Certified Trainers from Maui, Hawaii, USA

Jori and Jim Manske, principals of Peaceworks, are CNVC Certified Trainers and certified practitioners of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). Married for more than 30 years, they share the intentions to cooperate together in the great adventure of life, openly and honestly share their deepest thoughts and feelings and honor and accept each other with ever-increasing ability. These intentions continue to frame not only their relationship together, but also all their relationships and work.

They have been actively studying communication skills as well as personal and interpersonal awareness since the 70's, presenting training, facilitation, mediations and classes to businesses, community groups, government agencies, NGO's, private groups and individuals since 1971.

After living for almost 30 years in Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA, they recently re-located to Haiku, Hawaii, USA. Although based in Hawaii, they travel to the mainland 3 times per year for the retreats of their Compassionate Leadership extended trainings with co-trainers Rodger Sorrow and Faye Landey (compassionateleadership.com), as well as other trainings. They are also working on Pathways to Liberation with co-trainers Jake Gotwals and Jack Lehman, with whom they have developed a self-assessment matrix available at Pathways to Liberation.

In June 2008, they completed their term as inaugural leaders of the Global Community Circle (GCC) for The Center for Nonviolent Communication. The GCC mission is to support the growth and well-being of communities in the worldwide CNVC network. Jori served on the CNVC Board of Directors and served as the Interim Director of CNVC from January 2006 until May 2007. During this period, Jim organized several International Intensive Trainings and two Special Sessions for CNVC.

Jim and Jori offer training, mediation, facilitation, organizational transformation, coaching, mentoring and classes in integrating NVC. They remain eager to discover new ways of sharing NVC, and offer a variety of trainings through NVC Academy.

Website: Radical Compassion

NVC Library Resources with Jim & Jori Manske

This exercise explains four stages of the "Need Cycle": Fulfilled, Emerging, Urgent, Satisfying. It asks us to consider, connect and identify needs, feelings and where we are in the Need Cycle. Then it prompts us to remain mindful of the need for sustenance as we move through the cycle, noticing the subtle shifts in your physical sensations and emotions.
Here's a five-step 30 day practice to cultivate gratitude, using the practice of observations, needs, feelings, presence, vitality, awareness of contribution, sharing power and interdependence.
  • Navigate through old negative patterns that arise during the holidays
  • Enhance your ability to make requests around your needs and wishes
  • Learn when to "say something" and when to wait if conflicts arise
  • Increase your love and empathy for those you cherish
  • Open yourself to savoring every moment - regardless of the outcome
Jim and Jori discuss the root of Nonviolent Communication, needs consciousness. Participate in guided processes to deepen your own needs consciousness.
  • Meets on the fourth Saturday of most months
  • Experience a taste of living within an empathic community
  • Enjoy short yet powerful training / practice sessions with our trainers
  • Learn concrete skills and steps for practicing compassion and leadership
Jim and Jori’s Zero Step helps you focus your attention on your intention to connect, and then affirms your intention to live in the present. Listen in as they demonstrate the process — and learn about the benefits of using and cultivating it!
Join CNVC Certified Trainers Jim and Jori Manske for this session that will help you minimize your reactivity and live in greater choice.
Inspired by a talk given by Marshall Rosenberg, Jim offers an interactive exploration of powerful strategies for making NVC an integral part of your everyday life.
Jori and Jim Manske offer a process they call "The Zero Step," encompassing the characteristics of warmth toward self and other, care for the vitality of both yourself and other(s), wonder/interest, vulnerability and empathy, which leads directly to connection requestsand an openness to outcome.
Join Jori and Jim Manske to explore, learn and practice an NVC approach to mourning and celebration.
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