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NVC Library search results for: demands

Differentiating Needs from Strategies

Differentiating Needs from Strategies

Differentiating Needs from Strategies

with Mary Mackenzie

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • Read time: 2-3 minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
Read time: 2-3 minutes

Trainer tip: When we focus on needs further possibilities are more likely to open up. When we focus on a particular strategy, our world can feel scarce and conflicts can arise. Resolution comes when we value everyone’s needs and seek mutually satisfying solutions. We can ask for support towards this outcome.

Persisting vs. Demanding

Persisting vs. Demanding

Persisting vs. Demanding

with Mary Mackenzie

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 1 page

Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 page

Trainer Tip: Persisting without demanding is the art of what Marshall Rosenberg fondly called "Dogging for our needs." We can learn to not give up on our needs and at the same time, refrain from demanding they be met.

Choice in the Face of Demands

Choice in the Face of Demands

Choice in the Face of Demands

with Arnina Kashtan

Beginner Skill Level • Audio • 01:08 hours/minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Audio
01:08 hours/minutes

No one likes demands. Do you want to have access to choice when requests or demands come your way? Join CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan as she provides tools to free yourself from the submit/rebel dynamic.

Demands vs Requests

Demands vs Requests

Demands vs Requests

with Mary Mackenzie

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • Read time: 2-3 minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
Read time: 2-3 minutes

Trainer tip: Demands are more likely to limit the possibilities and create distance between people. The trick to asking something as a request is valuing everyone’s needs equally. When you value everyone’s needs equally, then you are more willing to come to solutions that satisfy everyone. It thus opens possibilities and helps build connection.

Parenting Series: Understanding Requests and Demands

Parenting Series: Understanding Requests and Demands

Parenting Series: Understanding Requests and Demands

with Inbal Kashtan

Beginner Skill Level • Video • 00:08 hours:minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Video
00:08 hours:minutes

Inbal speaks to a group about our habit of demanding something of our children but making it sound like a request, the components of a true request and the importance of being honest when making a demand.

Choice in Every Moment

Choice in Every Moment

Choice in Every Moment

with Miki Kashtan

Intermediate Skill Level • Audio • 00:31 hours:minutes/seconds

Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
00:31 hours:minutes/seconds

This 31-minute audio with Miki Kashtan is packed full of power as she uncovers the dynamics of choice that are present 100% of the time, in every situation, regardless of the circumstances.

Transforming Power Relations: The Invisible Revolution

Transforming Power Relations: The Invisible Revolution

Transforming Power Relations: The Invisible Revolution

with Miki Kashtan

Intermediate Skill Level • Article • 9 pages

Intermediate Skill Level
Article
9 pages

Miki explains how teachers and administrators can become more effective in relating to themselves, other faculty and staff, and they can contribute more to students' ability to feel connected and energized. Nonviolent Communication provides specific tools to empower ourselves and others to live more in line with our values and deeper needs.

Honor Your Need to be Heard

Honor Your Need to be Heard

Honor Your Need to be Heard

with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

Beginner Skill Level • Article • Read time: 2-3 minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Article
Read time: 2-3 minutes

When you want to be heard, first check if your listener is available. This honors yourself, and the other person’s choice about listening. You need to be clear about wanting a particular quality of listening, and that you are willing to wait if that isn’t available in the moment. Read on for how to ask for listening in a way that can build trust that your request isn't a demand.

Let it RAIN!

Let it RAIN!

Let it RAIN!

with Jim Manske

Beginner Skill Level • Article • Read time: 5 - 8 minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Article
Read time: 5 - 8 minutes

This article outlines a four-part transformation process to help us recognize what's giving rise to our suffering and resentment -- and transform it into more freedom, creativity, and choice.

Emotionally Exhausted? Try Empathy

Emotionally Exhausted? Try Empathy

Emotionally Exhausted? Try Empathy

with Sarah Peyton

Beginner Skill Level • Article • Read Time: 2 - 4 minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Article
Read Time: 2 - 4 minutes

Living in this ceaselessly demanding world, how do we recover from emotional exhaustion? The hopelessness of not being met in the world can leave us wrung out like an old mop. Our heart rate plummets, our blood pressure and respiration drop, and energy and information processing start slogging along. Instead, we can build the bridge of empathy for greater rejuvenation.

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 7. Talk about Conflict When You’re Not in Conflict

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 7. Talk about Conflict When You’re Not in Conflict

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 7. Talk about Conflict When You’re Not in Conflict

with Eric Bowers

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 4 pages

Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
4 pages

Conflict is a normal and natural part of life. To varying degrees, it happens whenever two or more people consistently spend time together. Resolving conflict effectively and peacefully, in a way in which all parties feel respected and valued, does not feel natural for those of us who grew up with punitive, adversarial, or avoidant approaches to conflict. Eric offers some tips for approaching...

The Gift of Compassionate Giving

The Gift of Compassionate Giving

The Gift of Compassionate Giving

with Jim Manske

Introductory Skill Level • Article • Read time: 5 - 8 minutes

Introductory Skill Level
Article
Read time: 5 - 8 minutes

What would the world be like if there was flow between all of us based on "mutual giving from the heart"? Using examples, this article offers models for us to follow that could inspire us to treat our NVC practice as one of compassionate giving and receiving.

Mediate Your Life: Resolving Internal Conflicts (Part 5)

Mediate Your Life: Resolving Internal Conflicts (Part 5)

Mediate Your Life: Resolving Internal Conflicts (Part 5)

with Ike Lasater and John Kinyon

Intermediate Skill Level • Audio • 01:19 hours:minutes

Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
01:19 hours:minutes

If you wish you could stay more centered and present in the face of difficult or demanding situations, this course will provide some powerful tools for you. In this session, Join John and Ike as they review the Chooser-Educator Process (C-E) and demonstrate the "Barriers in the Chairs" process to help you get beyond the obstacles that keep you from your goals.

Moving Beyond Needs as Met or Unmet

Moving Beyond Needs as Met or Unmet

Moving Beyond Needs as Met or Unmet

with Peggy Smith

Beginner Skill Level • Article • Read time: 5 - 8 minutes

Beginner Skill Level
Article
Read time: 5 - 8 minutes

Sometimes when we regard needs as something that could be met or unmet by another person or by a situation we unconsciously hold the belief that our needs should be met. Or we end up holding blame or implying wrongdoing. People are more likely to resist a request made from this stance. Instead, here are practices to increasingly losen any remaining attachment or demand energy -- and open our...

Developing Compassion for Humans, Animals and All Life (Complete Course)

Developing Compassion for Humans, Animals and All Life (Complete Course)

Developing Compassion for Humans, Animals and All Life (Complete Course)

with LoraKim Joyner, DVM

Beginner Skill Level • Audio • 5 - 7 hours

Beginner Skill Level
Audio
5 - 7 hours

Join LoraKim Joyner to investigate how merging science, the social and emotional intelligence of humans, animals and other species and Nonviolent Communication can bring a greater sense of belonging and wholeness to your life, and care and justice to the lives of others. The first part of this course is available for all to listen to and enjoy:

Key Assumptions and Intentions of NVC

Key Assumptions and Intentions of NVC

Key Assumptions and Intentions of NVC

with Inbal Kashtan and Miki Kashtan

Introductory Skill Level • Learning Tool • 3 pages

Introductory Skill Level
Learning Tool
3 pages

NVC practice is based on several key assumptions and intentions. When we live based on these assumptions and intentions, self-connection and connection with others become increasingly possible and easy, helping us contribute to a world where everyone’s needs are attended to peacefully.

Don't Take It Personally

Don't Take It Personally

Don't Take It Personally

with Rachelle Lamb

All Skill Levels • Article • Read time: 10 - 15 minutes

All Skill Levels
Article
Read time: 10 - 15 minutes

When we don't like what someone is saying to us, sometimes people encourage us to hear their needs, and "not take it personally" -- and we're inclined to agree. Could "not taking it personally" close our hearts and awareness to others, life and ourselves? Rachelle Lamb invites us to take a closer look at what it's like when we attend to the situation from our hearts, and skillfully reflect upon...

Money, Value, and Our Choices

Money, Value, and Our Choices

Money, Value, and Our Choices

with Miki Kashtan

Advanced Skill Level • Article • Read time: 10 - 15 minutes

Advanced Skill Level
Article
Read time: 10 - 15 minutes

How much money to pay? And how much money to ask for? The supply and demand logic basically say that we ask for the most that “the market can absorb” and pay “the least that we can get away with.” We can instead, we can engage in experiments that focus on connecting to and satisfying needs. We can also engage with our varying degrees of access to resources within the existing economy and...

Taking 100% Responsibility for Every Relationship (Complete Course)

Taking 100% Responsibility for Every Relationship (Complete Course)

Taking 100% Responsibility for Every Relationship (Complete Course)

with Miki Kashtan

Intermediate Skill Level • Audio • 4 - 6 hours

Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
4 - 6 hours

Taking 100% Responsibility offers a powerful antidote to the all-too-common dynamic of blaming that leaves you in the victim position and unable to have the relationship you want. Miki invites you to assume a stance of leadership while holding full care for both parties’ needs. No longer will you need to wait for the other person to change, nor will you need to give up your needs to reach...

Being Honest About Our Anger

Being Honest About Our Anger

Being Honest About Our Anger

with Mary Mackenzie

Beginner Skill Level • Trainer Tip • 1 page

Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 page

Trainer Tip: Mary shares how staying present to our anger and finding the underlying feelings and needs can lead to deeper connection and more satisfying outcomes.

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