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Thawing, Healing Warmth

Dear Friend,

Ah, March…

When I lived in the mountains, March meant a slight lessening of the chill in the air. There was a lot of snow still, but it was wet and heavy and was often followed by a rain that would melt it quickly. And then, magically, I'd see a daffodil bloom poke its head out of the snow and feel gleeful. Spring is on the way! And it's time to ready ourselves for it.

This morning I'm thinking about Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of Nonviolent Communication (NVC), and feeling deeply grateful for my own emotional thawing that happened as a result of my NVC work.

I came to NVC angry and heavy with pent-up and unexpressed emotions. I didn't understand the impact of all I had been holding onto until one moment in a workshop when I received full-on, connecting empathy for the first time. My emotions burst open and I felt completely free in a way I had never before experienced: the kind of freedom that happens when we are seen and understood – and there's an allowing for all emotion.

When those moments happen, I feel a combination of grief and joy – grief for the times when I wasn't understood and for whatever I'm working on in the moment, and joy for the depth of connection in the moment.

Speaking of the depth of connection… The other day I called my dear friend Georgia. I was feeling mad about a mutual friend's recent passing. Georgia received me with cheer and understanding. She wasn't mad but she let me be mad. She doesn't know the formal empathy process, yet Georgia's a natural at it because with a few words and a lot of listening, she helped me find my soft heart again, and helped me grieve and grieve.

Later that night, I wrote a good-bye letter to our friend, and included a few of our favorite prayers and my personal prayer for her. The entire process was healing and readied me to finally say good-bye…

It all starts with a thawing of the anger, coldness, or hardness I may be feeling – and it brings me back to softness, warmth and love. In that emotional space there's room for all emotions and healing.

Let's spend this month focused on warmth. Let's look for those places that invite it in – like a daffodil growing out of the snow – and demonstrate it to others.

With a warm hug,

CNVC Certified Trainer and Co-Founder, NVC Academy
p.s. You may also now read Mary's monthly letters on her blog!

Monthly Gift. Creating Safety and Ease in Your Groups. Mary Mackenzie ~ from Facilitate NVC Groups with Joy and Confidence. Listen in as Mary offers suggestions around: 1) how to build trust in a group setting; 2) clues that demonstrate a group’s lack of trust; and 3) signs that indicate a participants' need for trust isn't being met.  Listen. If you find yourself feeling intrigued by the suggestions Mary offered, you may enjoy signing up for her upcoming course, Facilitate NVC Groups with Joy and Confidence (updated for 2019) which begins March 21st. Come rediscover the ease and joy of sharing NVC! Enjoy a Weekly Boost of NVC! NVC Reflections, with Mary Mackenzie. Now you can receive thought-provoking, weekly excerpts from Peaceful Living, Mary’s daily meditation book for living NVC — consciously. Sign Up.

Upcoming Courses and Events

All times listed are Pacific (California) times.


Responding to the Call of Our Times:
A Leadership Coaching Program (2019)
Miki Kashtan
Fridays, February 1 - December 13 • 12:00pm - 2:00pm PST / PDT


Facilitate NVC Groups with Joy and Confidence (2019)
Mary Mackenzie
Thursdays, March 21 - June 13 • 12:00pm - 2:00pm PDT


Beyond Right and Wrong:
The Fields of Nonviolent Communication
and Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction

Stephanie Bachmann Mattei and Maurizio Cortesi
Tuesdays, April 9 - May 28 • 10:00am - 12:00pm PDT


Embracing Your Wounded Child
Martha Lasley
Wednesdays, April 24 - May 29 • 4:00 - 6:00pm PDT


Empathy Magic
How to Streamline Your NVC Practice
and Make Empathy Second Nature

Dian Killian
Wednesdays, May 8 – June 12 • 3:00 - 4:30pm PDT


Taste of Compassionate Leadership:
Monthly Video Conference ~ FREE
Jim Manske, Jori Manske, and Guest Trainers
4th Saturdays, Monthly • Ongoing • 4:00 - 6:00pm PDT / PST

Want to Know What’s New with NVC? Take a look at Connection Central! It’s THE place to find the latest writings from well-known NVC trainers such as Eric Bowers, Miki Kashtan, Dian Killian, Sarah Peyton, Rachelle Lamb, Erin Mayhew, David Weinstock, Roberta Wall, Mary Mackenzie, and others. Take a Look. NVC Multimedia Library. The world’s largest online NVC training library. Get Exposed to NVC Join us! Become a member of our Library and expose yourself to a broad spectrum of tips, tools, and trainers who can easily help you delve into, discover, and share NVC. You’ll learn which approaches most resonate with you – and we’re adding new materials all the time! Check It Out. Staff Pick of Staff Pick of the Month (Benefit exclusive to Library members). Dealing with Hecklers and People You Don’t Like. Mary Mackenzie ~ from Facilitate NVC Groups with Joy and Confidence. This is a tremendous resource for both improving your facilitation skills and deepening your NVC consciousness.  Creative and thoughtful approaches to everything! —Robin O’Brien, NVCA Course Coordinator. Listen.the Month (Benefit exclusive to Library members). Responding to the Call of Our Times. Miki Kashtan ~ 2018 Telethon Session. I love the insights, resources, and inspiration I get from this course. It gives you a glimpse into the support Miki offers around deepening the practice of nonviolence in thought, word, and action. —Lore Baur, NVCA Course Coordinator, CNVC Certified Trainer. Listen. NVC Marketplace. Popular NVC Trainer Recordings. Need to add to your personal NVC library? You’ll find a wide variety of inspirational and educational recordings in our NVC Marketplace. Check It Out.
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