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New NVC Library
Learning Resources

New NVC Library
Learning Resources

How To Stay Grounded In A Reactive Moment: Observing, Anchoring And Reflecting

Article • 4 - 6 minutes • 9/29//2021
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes
9/29//2021

To shift reactivity by moving yourself from the position of experiencer to observer, name what’s happening. This can help you access other skills for managing reactivity. Also, create a strong emotional anchor.


Responding To "Power Over" Interactions

Article • 5 - 7 minutes • 10/29/2021
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
5 - 7 minutes
10/29/2021

Based on your observations of "power with" interactions choose a specific, do-able to practice so that you're prepared the next time you're in a power under/power over dynamic. Keep the practice simple to do in a difficult moment. Then reflect: identify what you did (internally or externally) or said that (de)escalated the dynamic. This practice requires noticing what went well, self compassion, perseverance, and support.


Directness

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/29/2021
Beginner Skill level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/29/2021

Trainer Tip: We may communicate indirectly when we worry about hurting someone’s feelings. Instead, commit to being direct with compassion, love, honesty, and respect to both yourself and others. They may not enjoy what you say, but at least they'll know where you're coming from. Being true to yourself, you can be true to your relationships. And it can build trust.


Distinguishing Response from Reaction

Trainer Tip • 10 - 15 minutes • 10/15/2020
All Skill Levels
Trainer Tip
10 - 15 minutes
10/15/2020

In this book excerpt, Kathleen and Jared offer a path to reach deeper clarity, distinguishing between response and reaction.


Crafting Connection Requests

Practice Exercise • 2 - 3 minutes • 10/03/2021
Intermediate Skill Level
Practice Exercise
2 - 3 minutes
10/03/2021

Try this four step exercise for making connection requests to support understanding, and to learn what effect your words had on the listener. In this exercise you'll choose a situation where you have clarity about what outcome will really work for you (your solution request), but where you imagine your desired outcome may not work for the other person, and/or are not sure there is sufficient connection for mutual trust.


NVC LIfe Hacks 11: Effective Requests

Video • 4 minutes • 01/25/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Video
4 minutes
01/25/2019

Underlying much of our communication is a request: when we say something, we're usually expecting something else — perhaps something subtle — in return. Let's look at how to make requests clearer and more do-able, avoiding the pitfall of demands.


Contemplative Practice For Spiritual Insight

Article • 3 - 5 minutes • 9/29/2021
Advanced Skill Level
Article
3 - 5 minutes
9/29/2021

A structured and clear contemplative practice can start with calming the body, heart, and mind for 20 minutes. Next, it contains at least three key elements: body awareness, clarifying what you already know, and consistent sustained attention. Celebrate and note insights, or any expanded perspective that pops into your awareness. Set an intention to notice these things in daily life and to practice further.


The Apology: Brussel Sprouts for the Relationship

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Video • 1 hour, 1 minute • 11/16/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Video
1 hour, 1 minute
11/16/2019

How do you repair a relationship when your words or actions unintentionally impact another in a negative way? And what keeps you from apologizing? Join Lore to explore – and answer – these questions and more!


Keeping The Focus On Ourselves

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/29/2021
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/29/2021

Trainer Tip: Next time you prepare for a challenging conversation, solidly connect with your own feelings and needs before entering into meeting. Then attend the meeting open to creating results that work for everyone. This is likely to give increase chances that the conversation will come to a mutually satisfying conclusion.


Facilitation and Transparency

Video • 9 minutes • 05/21/2020
Intermediate Skill Level
Video
9 minutes
05/21/2020

Transparency: when is it too much? Does it support connection, clarity and flow? Is being transparent supporting your needs, the group's needs, and the group's purpose for being together? Check out this thoughtful excerpt from Mary's 2020 course, Jump In Now. Good food for thought!


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