Articles (270)
The Ultimate Romance
with Eric Bowers
Article • 6 - 9 minutes • 01/2018
All Skill Levels
Article
6 - 9 minutes
01/2018
Article
6 - 9 minutes
01/2018
For the ultimate romance to unfold, as an expression of your care for how your words and actions affect others, prioritize digging into your inner work before addressing conflict with them. This means doing the inner work necessary to get to the root of the…
Responding to Anger
with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé
Article • 5-8 minutes • 05/2018
Beginner Skill Level
Article
5-8 minutes
05/2018
Article
5-8 minutes
05/2018
When someone wants to speak angrily about another, do you want to move away, try to calm them, argue, set a boundary, or offer empathy? What supports you to stay self connected? You can set boundaries regarding listening so that you're less likely to defend…
Preparing for Difficult Dialogue
with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé
Article • 3-5 minutes • 1/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3-5 minutes
1/2019
Article
3-5 minutes
1/2019
Effective and connected dialogue requires significant self-awareness, mindfulness, and skill. You can focus on any of these six areas that most often escape your awareness: anchoring and staying grounded; boundaries; thoughts and beliefs; stuckness or attachment; feelings and needs; and requests. Read on for a…
Help for Overwhelm
with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé
Article • 3-5 minutes • 11/2019
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3-5 minutes
11/2019
Article
3-5 minutes
11/2019
Reducing overwhelm requires you to reconnect with your authentic choice, be present and compassionate with what's happening, heal trauma, and interrupt the trauma response. Read on for ways that may help you reconnect with your choice, presence and more on trauma.
Honor Your Need to be Heard
with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé
Article • 2-3 minutes • 04/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Article
2-3 minutes
04/2019
Article
2-3 minutes
04/2019
When you want to be heard, first check if your listener is available. This honors yourself, and the other person’s choice about listening. You need to be clear about wanting a particular quality of listening, and that you are willing to wait if that isn’t…
Creating Real Challenges—Are you Game?
with Martha Lasley
Article • 4 - 6 minutes • 2/2015
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes
2/2015
Article
4 - 6 minutes
2/2015
A challenge is an expansion of making a clear, positive doable request — and, when given, the person feels deeply seen by the challenger. A challenge isn't just about getting someone to take action on something important to them; it's a fierce form of empathy…
Getting Stuck Arguments Unstuck
with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé
Article • 3-5 minutes • 8/2018
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3-5 minutes
8/2018
Article
3-5 minutes
8/2018
Some arguments stay stuck because each person thinks it's about the content of the argument, rather than the needs each person is attempting to protect. When the needs get attached to the strategies a "no way out" scenario gets created. Instead, fully step into one…
Grounded Responses for Challenging Comments
with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé
Article • 3 - 5 minutes • 09/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3 - 5 minutes
09/2019
Article
3 - 5 minutes
09/2019
When someone responds with painful sarcasm, criticism, or dismissal you can respond with empathy, or with clarity about your intention, need and request. If you're unable to do this, later you can privately write what they said, identify the feelings and needs of both of…
Interdependence in Action: How to Change Agreements with Care
Interdependence in Action: How to Change Agreements with Care
Interdependence in Action: How to Change Agreements with Care
with Miki Kashtan
Article • 13 - 19 minutes • 1/2019
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
13 - 19 minutes
1/2019
Article
13 - 19 minutes
1/2019
The awareness and practice of interdependence is integral to holding an NVC consciousness. Practicing interdependence also means bringing in a quality of care in the moments we want to change agreements with others. This article talks about where our various choices, in regards to changing…
Prevent Misunderstanding--One Simple Strategy
with LaShelle Lowe-Chardé
Article • 2-3 minutes • 8/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Article
2-3 minutes
8/2019
Article
2-3 minutes
8/2019
Misunderstandings can be painful. We can easily avoid this by checking what the other person understood from what we said, and ask the other person to do the same. Doing this is especially important when it comes to planning, shared decision-making, and when emotions are…