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NVC Library

Articles (262)

How can Nonviolent Communication (NVC) Be Helpful in These Transformative Times?

Article • 23 - 34 minutes • 06/2020
All Skill Levels
Article
23 - 34 minutes
06/2020
Amidst racial violence, there are things that NVC can offer. And there are places where NVC culture needs to be more vigilant. Here are examples of where, amidst incredible loss and pain, "allies" and communities commonly (and often unknowingly) create false equivalences, minimization and re-injure…

Moving Beyond Needs as Met or Unmet

Article • 5 - 8 minutes • 10/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
10/2019
Sometimes when we regard needs as something that could be met or unmet by another person or by a situation we unconsciously hold the belief that our needs should be met. Or we end up holding blame or implying wrongdoing. People are more likely to…

The Power of Authenticity + Care

Article • 9 - 13 minutes • 04/2019
All Skill Levels
Article
9 - 13 minutes
04/2019
When we're on the receiving end of pain-stimulating assumptions, a microaggression, or prejudice --when we're reactive and resultingly have self-doubt, guilt or shame in ourselves-- is it possible to be intensely authentic while holding care for everyone in the situation? Can we effectively do this…

Creating an Internal Secure Base

Article • 5 - 8 minutes • 9/2018
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
9/2018
We each hold an internal model or set of expectations about how caring and comfort could be accessed in relationship. The ability to reflect upon and challenge our own dominant model of perceptions, beliefs, and behaviors --and to experience discomfort and vulnerability-- is a key…

Prevent Misunderstanding--One Simple Strategy

Article • 2-3 minutes • 8/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Article
2-3 minutes
8/2019
Misunderstandings can be painful. We can easily avoid this by checking what the other person understood from what we said, and ask the other person to do the same. Doing this is especially important when it comes to planning, shared decision-making, and when emotions are…

Grounded Responses for Challenging Comments

Article • 3 - 5 minutes • 09/2019
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3 - 5 minutes
09/2019
When someone responds with painful sarcasm, criticism, or dismissal you can respond with empathy, or with clarity about your intention, need and request. If you're unable to do this, later you can privately write what they said, identify the feelings and needs of both of…

Four Questions to Ask Yourself Before Important Conversations

Article • 5 - 8 minutes • 11/2019
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
11/2019
What's my intention? What needs am I trying to meet? What do I want the other person to know or understand? How can I say it in a way they are most likely to hear? These are four questions we can use in preparation for…

Confronting with Care: An Approach that Builds Trust

Article • 7 - 10 minutes • 11/2010
Beginner Skill Level
Article
7 - 10 minutes
11/2010
People find confrontation inspirational when done with full compassion and intention to support. To do this, transform your own judgments or distress, come with useful content plus spot-on timing, and the best interests of the receiver in mind. Read on for questions you can ask…

Connecting with Ourselves: An NVC Foundation for Inner Trust and Freedom

Article • 4 - 6 minutes • 01/2009
Beginner Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes
01/2009
True inner freedom arises from self-connection. Without self-connection, we're mostly acting from habits, and those habits do not necessarily attend to our own needs. Here's a practice you can explore in your daily life to deepen your relationship with yourself, and experience true choice and…

Why Do I Feel Depressed?

Article • 7 - 11 minutes • 04/2018
Beginner Skill Level
Article
7 - 11 minutes
04/2018
When does identifying our or others' needs become a coping mechanism that hides the real problems that go unaddressed, and thereby reinforcing problems?  This article zooms out to take a look at how dealing with our needs in the absence of the larger picture can…

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