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NVC Resources on Observation


The Timing of Making A Request

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 09/29/2021
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
09/29/2021
It's important to make requests specific and doable. Also, without a swift request immediately after we state our observation, feeling, and need in regard to the situation, the other person is left guessing what we want. Instead, a swift request can bring clarity and lessen the potential for the listener to become defensive or argue.

Observation, the First Component of Nonviolent Communication

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer tip: People often presume why something happened before checking with the other person. Instead, if we were to name the facts of what happened through observation without adding in our own judgments or reasons why we think it happened, we can more easily open the possibility for deeper connection with the other person. Read on for more on making observations.

What is Nonviolent Communication?

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer tip: NVC focuses on shared human values and needs, and encourages the use of language that increases good will -- plus avoidance of language that contributes to resentment or lowered self-esteem. It emphasizes taking personal responsibility for choices and improving the quality of relationships as a primary goal. For today, focus on making observations without moralistic judgment in at...

Can NVC Be Learned Without Learning Observation, Feeling, Need and Request?

with Bridget Belgrave, Jeff Brown and Mary Mackenzie
Audio • 44 minutes • 03/2012
Audio
44 minutes
03/2012
In this enlightening Trainer Conversation, three veteran CNVC Certified Trainers discuss whether NVC can be learned without first learning Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests (OFNR). The conversation naturally meanders as the trainers grapple with the question, eventually covering a wide-range of topics including the spirituality and true essence of NVC.

Increasing Presence Through Observations

Practice Exercise • 00:26 hours:minutes • 01/2010
Practice Exercise
00:26 hours:minutes
01/2010
John Kinyon leads participants through two Observation Exercises to strengthen their ability to be present. Through the exercises, John distinguishes the difference between feelings, which are emotions felt inside the body, and observations which are witness to our experience.

Honesty Is the Key

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: In Nonviolent Communication, we see expressing honesty as a gift of our authenticity, and a chance for others to support us in getting our needs met -- this can flourish and deepen our relationships. We can notice and act on opportunities to be honest with the components of OFNR (Observations, Feelings, Needs, and Requests).

Timing of a request

Trainer Tip • 1-2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1-2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: Stating our observations, feelings and needs can still be heard as criticism if we don't follow it up right away with a specific, doable request. Ending your statement with a request for what you want can clarify the situation and reduce the chances that you'll be met with defensiveness. Read on for an example.

Observing: Practicing the distinction between "observation" and "observation mixed with evaluation"

Practice Exercise • 1 - 2 minutes • 1/2020
Practice Exercise
1 - 2 minutes
1/2020
Recalling Krishnamurti, Marshall referred to the capability of distinguishing observation vs observation mixed with evaluation as "the highest form of human intelligence." Read on for an exercise to help practice the skill of observation in combination with mindful walking.

Self Empathy/Regulation Process

Practice Exercise • 30 minutes • 12/1/2016
Practice Exercise
30 minutes
12/1/2016
Building your body and mind awareness can help you better regulate/calm your emotions. Regular self-empathy will help you better regulate your emotions as well as increase your body and mind awareness. If you are not aware of amygdala activation(fight/flight/freeze response), you will react instead of responding with choice. Use this eight step process to develop your self empathy/regulation...

Observing without Judgment

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: Today, identify the facts, without adding your ideas about why people behave in certain ways. Then consider connecting with the person about what was going on with them. You will find that the more you observe life without judgment and evaluation, the more open you will be to hearing and connecting with other people.