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NVC Resources on Blame


Setting Boundaries with Reactivity

Article • 4-6 minutes • 12/2019
Article
4-6 minutes
12/2019
Tolerating reactivity, name-calling, blaming, guilt-tripping, or stonewalling can lead to resentment and hurt. Plus, the more you stay in a reactive dynamic, the more you are likely to reinforce the pattern. Setting life-serving boundaries arund reactivity is about letting another know that you aren’t going to participate in that kinds of dynamics. This means knowing what helps with handling...

Laughter, IPNB and Empathy

Article • 3 - 5 minutes • 10/2018
Article
3 - 5 minutes
10/2018
Sometimes even a very skilled empathy practicitioner can go into offering a non-empathic response, even when asked for empathy. Why? One reason could be that our brains might be less receptive because of unseen forces that affect our brain and relationship with others. This article speaks to the deeper "why" and also to one thing we could do to turn it around...

The Power of Difference: Work Challenges

Audio • 5 minutes • 07/10/2016
Audio
5 minutes
07/10/2016
How do you bring empathy and authenticity to uncomfortable work situations when there are so many layers of difference – especially if your primary reason for working is to feed your family and pay your bills? Listen in as Roxy opens participants' eyes to some of the many layers of difference we all deal with on a daily basis.

Anatomy of a Trigger: Change Your Focus and Improve the Outcome

Article • 7-10 minutes • 10/2017
Article
7-10 minutes
10/2017
When you or anyone is upset, what could underneath the trigger? There may be more than is immediately visible. This article invites us to explore what it looks like to inquire deeper, take self-responsibility, examine our assumptions, attachments, interpretations, and "certainties" that could be hidden behind the needs that are aching to be attended to...

The Ultimate Romance

Article • 6 - 9 minutes • 01/2018
Article
6 - 9 minutes
01/2018
For the ultimate romance to unfold, as an expression of your care for how your words and actions affect others, prioritize digging into your inner work before addressing conflict with them. This means doing the inner work necessary to get to the root of the issue, which can bring bigger shifts, more aliveness, love, creativity, inspiration and compassion. This doesn't mean letting the other...

The Price of Nice

Article • 12 - 16 minutes • 2000
Article
12 - 16 minutes
2000
Have you been nice? Well then you must be enjoying the reward: depression, intermittent explosiveness, job meaninglessness, ambiguous anxiety, low resentment and subtle self hate. The antidotes: honesty, passion and compassion.

The Cause of Our Feelings

with John Kinyon and Miki Kashtan
Trainer Tip • 3-5 minutes • Circa 2007
Trainer Tip
3-5 minutes
Circa 2007
Ask the Trainer: “I would love some clarity about the NVC perspective on the cause of our feelings. It seems to me that my needs may be met or not, but the cause of my painful feelings is my story around the situation.”

Observation: The Awareness of the Thoughts, Stories and Core Beliefs to Enhance Connection

Audio • 2 hours, 10 minutes • 06/2010
Audio
2 hours, 10 minutes
06/2010
In this recorded telecourse, John Kinyon, world renowned CNVC Certified Trainer, guides you through processes to strengthen your capacity for mindful presence and awareness of your thinking, and to develop the skills to translate thoughts into observations.

The Value of Taking a Step Back

Article • 6 - 9 minutes • 2002
Article
6 - 9 minutes
2002
Have you ever gotten a fishing line all tangled up? You got so frustrated you just started yanking on the different loops of line, which of course made the knots and tangles even tighter and more difficult to untangle. Wouldn’t it be great if you could notice the minute you were starting to tangle things up in a discussion with your loved one?

Where Do Jackal Voices Come From?

Article • 6 - 9 minutes • 02/2010
Article
6 - 9 minutes
02/2010
The human brain is a conservative organ that comprises different systems with varying degrees of conscious awareness, which evolved in three basic stages of human history (the lizard-squirrel-monkey brain.) In my understanding, we could say, the brain has strong needs for understanding, order, predictability and meaning. In fact, one of its key functions is to process experiences, and predict...