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NVC Resources on Trust



How to Invite Shared Vulnerability

Article • 3-4 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3-4 minutes
Shared vulnerability can build more intimacy, mutuality, being seen and heard, empathy, or community. Inviting shared vulnerability means earning another’s trust that you can consistently offer attentive, curious, and compassionate listening. Here are four strategies to invite shared vulnerability.

The Needs Underneath a Need for “Fairness”

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes
Advanced Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
Ask the Trainer: "I'm practicing with 'transforming the pain of unmet needs into the beauty of the need.' In identifying my unmet needs, I come up with 'fairness.' However, fairness isn't on the needs list! I'm wondering what needs might be underneath 'fairness.'"

Teachers Expressing to Students and Colleagues

Trainer Tip • 3 - 5 minutes
Advanced Skill Level
Trainer Tip
3 - 5 minutes
Ask the Trainer: "I just started teaching in a public school and I'm not enjoying the violence that teachers express towards children and their colleagues. However, when I talk about NVC, most people listen but I feel they're either not understanding it or..."

What the World Needs

Article • 3 pages
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3 pages
In this written transcript of a live presentation, Inbal Kashtan shares how she first became aware of poverty. She explains how empathy is a vital and powerful force for creating peace in our world today, and a powerful means of creating a world that works for all of us.

The Three Most Common Pitfalls in Nonviolent Communication

Article • 5 - 8 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
We're more likely to sacrifice trust, connection, and relationship quality when (1.) We use NVC to focus on being seen, understood, heard, or meeting our own needs in a way that eclipses our view and understanding of others needs; (2.) We don't clearly examine our intentions; and (3.) We use the NVC form so rigidly that it becomes difficult for others to connect with us authentically.

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 7. Talk about Conflict When You’re Not in Conflict

Trainer Tip • 4 - 6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
4 - 6 minutes
Conflict is a normal and natural part of life. To varying degrees, it happens whenever two or more people consistently spend time together. Resolving conflict effectively and peacefully, in a way in which all parties feel respected and valued, does not feel natural for those of us who grew up with punitive, adversarial, or avoidant approaches to conflict. Eric offers some tips for approaching...

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 10. Take It to the Trees

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
One of the most important things you can do to live a meaningful and rewarding life filled with vitality is reclaim your emotions. Eric offers a tip to reclaim your emotions, rescuing you from the numb and deadening state of “fine."

Baby Giraffes: NVC Parenting of Children Under 5 (3 Session Course)

Audio • 3 hours, 26 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
3 hours, 26 minutes
This 3-part telecourse recording explores what it means to practice “power with” parenting with babies, toddlers and preschoolers. Ingrid has been teaching and writing about very young children for a decade and has a special passion for this age range.

Don't Take It Personally

Article • 10 - 15 minutes
All Skill Levels
Article
10 - 15 minutes
When we don't like what someone is saying to us, sometimes people encourage us to hear their needs, and "not take it personally" -- and we're inclined to agree. Could "not taking it personally" close our hearts and awareness to others, life and ourselves? Rachelle Lamb invites us to take a closer look at what it's like when we attend to the situation from our hearts, and skillfully reflect upon...

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 13. The Eight Most Powerful Things You Can Do to Build an Inspiring Relationship

Trainer Tip • 4 - 6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
4 - 6 minutes
What are the most powerful things I can do to build an inspired relationship? I answered the question with romantic relationships in mind; however, I believe the answer below applies to all important relationships.

All in: Committing to a Life of Nonviolence (7 Session Course)

Audio • 6 - 8 hours
Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
6 - 8 hours
How can we live life fully connected to the core values of nonviolence, no matter the circumstances, internal or external? Join Miki Kashtan as she shares the 17 core commitments that have served as a compass for herself and hundreds of others around the world as well. The first session of this course is available for all to listen to and enjoy.

Empathy in the Face of Powerful Structures

Article • 12 - 18 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
12 - 18 minutes
Here's an inspiring story of one citizen (the author) who faced a police officer and judge in court to contest a transit ticket... and inspired structural changes in the way one aspect of New York City transit operates. She inspires change with her application of empathy for self and others, acknowledgement, connecting requests -- and an inspiring vision of understanding, shared reality and...

What About Psychopaths?

Article • 4 - 6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes
Sometimes we want to avoid placing our love and trust in someone, to protect our hearts and our life energies. And so there are deeper questions that we can use to check whether we're in relationship with someone who doesn't have capacity to be in relationship with us (eg. “Do I have a sense of mattering in this relationship?”). Read on for more questions we use to assess our empathy and...

Empathy vs. Investigation

Article • 4-6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
4-6 minutes
To tell the difference between empathy and investigation, watch for distinctions along four different dimensions: energy, subject, intention and trust. These distinctions can help us engage awareness and skill to meet your needs and respond to others’ needs in more direct ways. The more you meet your needs in conscious and direct ways, the more present you can be for others. Read on for more...

Honor Your Need to be Heard

Article • 2-3 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
2-3 minutes
When you want to be heard, first check if your listener is available. This honors yourself, and the other person’s choice about listening. You need to be clear about wanting a particular quality of listening, and that you are willing to wait if that isn’t available in the moment. Read on for how to ask for listening in a way that can build trust that your request isn't a demand.

 
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