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NVC Library

Trainer Tips (266)

Use of “To Be” Verbs

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • Circa 2007
Intermediate Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
Circa 2007
Ask the Trainer: “I heard a trainer say once that the ‘to be’ verbs aren’t really needs, such as to be heard, to be understood or to be valued. Can you help me understand why not?”

How to Interact with an Angry Practice Group Member

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes • 2007
Intermediate Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
2007
Ask the Trainer: “I would like some suggestions on how to interact with a member of the practice group I started. This individual speaks and acts in a manner I interpret as angry and controlling.”

How to Handle Being Judged

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes • Circa 2007
Intermediate Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
Circa 2007
Ask the Trainer: "I am wondering what to do with a judgment that is expressed by someone about me. In these situations I can't find the unmet need they are expressing (other than perhaps significance)."

Four Types of Feedback

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes • Circa 2007
Intermediate Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
Circa 2007
An exploration of four types of feedback: destructive criticism, constructive criticism, feedback by demonstration and dialogue.

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 11. Catching Hearts

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 01/2016
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
01/2016
When we take a leap in life and put our hearts out into the world in new or bigger ways—sharing a song, dance, or poem, writing a book, competing at a sporting event, giving a speech, and so on—there is greater potential for aliveness but…

Hidden Needs

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes • Circa 2007
Intermediate Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
Circa 2007
Ask the Trainer: "I've been feeling frustrated and angry quite a bit lately over very simple things. Can you help me get to the root of my hidden needs?"

Mediating Conflicts

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: When there's conflict if you set the intention to connect and build trust first, you're more likely to move towards resolution. This can be built through offering reflections that captures essence of what's important to each party. Once connection and trust is established,…

Mediating with a Group

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Intermediate Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: People struggle to come to agreement when they don’t feel heard. So as a mediator, facilitate the process by asking all parties to reflect the essence of what's important to other parties. This is critical. Once everyone is confident that their needs have…

The Difference Between Needs and Requests

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 11/30/2005
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
11/30/2005
Trainer Tip: Knowing the difference between what we need and what we want someone else to do about that need can have a profound impact on our relationships and our happiness.

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 24. Shine a Light on Your Shadow: Projection Detection and Reclaiming Disowned Parts

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 01/2016
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
01/2016
How do you know when you’re projecting disowned parts or replaying old relationship dynamics? It’s hard to know for sure, but if you find yourself upset or shutting down and unable to have a dialogue in which you can speak clearly about your feelings and…

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