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Bob Wentworth

CNVC Certified Trainer from California, USA

Bob Wentworth is a CNVC Certified Trainer, coach, and co-founder of Family HEART Camp (familyheartcamp.org). Bob focuses on ways to bring more love, empowerment, and wholeness into the world. Before discovering NVC, he realized that a key factor in most seemingly intractable social problems is our tendency to divide the world into Us and Them, and dismiss Them as somehow less than fully human and not worth listening to, thereby cutting off the flow of information needed to solve problems. NVC is the best practical antidote Bob has have found to this pervasive phenomenon, as well as offering a deep spiritual path. Bob has worked as a software architect and hasa Ph.D. in Applied Physics from Stanford University.

Latest NVC Library Resources with Bob Wentworth

Moving Towards Life-Serving Responsibility in NVC

In the "obnoxious stage" we care for our needs in a way that doesn't respect others' needs. In the "emotional liberation" stage we fully care for others' needs as much as our own—while being free of fear, guilt, shame, or obligation. Often NVC training teaches us how to achieve the latter stage without the former. For greater compassion we can be more rigorous in how we talk about “responsibility", impacts and interdependence.

Independence vs. Interdependence in NVC

For us to have a more peaceful world and relationships, growing our skills to engage interdependently is key. An interdependence-oriented person may choose to attend to both inner factors and outer factors that affect their own and others' experiences. Unfortunately, this is likely to be misunderstood by independence-oriented people as enmeshment -- and this is where conflict emerges. Read on for more.

Trauma and Sanctuary

One clue we have trauma is when we respond in a way we don't want (eg. being reactive, self sabotaging, etc). Even when we have high level NVC skills our trauma-related mechanisms can activate, and we can lose access to well honed NVC skills. Read on for approaches that involve healing trauma, and approaches that involve managing the effects of trauma and preventing additional trauma.

Changing Our Habitual Approach to Change

Most of us subject ourselves to so many painful mental jabs and they seldom stimulate helpful change. We can be like a frustrated animal trainer repeatedly whipping an animal, without ever helping the animal to understand what behavior is wanted or offering encouragement. Instead, punishing thoughts can be stepping stones to awareness. We can focus on sensing what we're really aspiring to. This is more likely to eventually produce sustainable change that'll serve us better.

Shifting the Way We Do Things

The way we talk to one another, and think about or react to our lives, may seem "normal" but eventually, this may reach a point where we realize something isn't working, and we make adjustments. But often the suffering continues if we aren't addressing root causes. In studying NVC we can become more aware of what we are doing and its effects -- plus imagine and implement alternatives that lead to greater fulfillment for self and others.