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Mediate Your Life: Resolving Internal Conflicts (Part 5)

Audio • 1 hour, 19 minutes • 10/28/2014
Audio
1 hour, 19 minutes
10/28/2014
If you wish you could stay more centered and present in the face of difficult or demanding situations, this course will provide some powerful tools for you. In this session, join John and Ike as they review the Chooser-Educator Process (C-E) and demonstrate the "Barriers in the Chairs" process to help you get beyond the obstacles that keep you from your goals.

Mediate Your Life: Chooser Educator Map

with Ike Lasater and John Kinyon
Audio • 12 minutes • 01/26/2016
Audio
12 minutes
01/26/2016
When you have intrusive thoughts about yourself and feel ‘crummy,’ Ike recommends using the Chooser / Educator map as a guide to lead you out of the primitive part of your brain and back to your prefrontal cortex. Both the Chooser and the Educator want to contribute to your well being, but in different ways. This map facilitates having a positive conversation with them.

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 8. Practice Self-Empathy with Your Whole Body

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 01/2016
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
01/2016
In our fast-paced, busy lives it is tempting to practice NVC mostly with the left hemisphere of the brain, thinking through the steps quickly without slowing down to connect more deeply with feelings and needs. Don't miss an opportunity to integrate the hemispheres of the brain and the valuable information from the neural networks in the heart and gut.

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 7. Talk about Conflict When You’re Not in Conflict

Trainer Tip • 4 - 6 minutes • 01/2016
Trainer Tip
4 - 6 minutes
01/2016
Conflict is a normal and natural part of life. To varying degrees, it happens whenever two or more people consistently spend time together. Resolving conflict effectively and peacefully, in a way in which all parties feel respected and valued, does not feel natural for those of us who grew up with punitive, adversarial, or avoidant approaches to conflict. Eric offers some tips for approaching...

Nonviolent Communication Basics

Article • 4 - 6 minutes • 07/2017
Article
4 - 6 minutes
07/2017
Here are some very basic forms and distinctions of NVC. It covers the 4 D's, OFNR, some NVC distinctions, tips, quotes from Marshall Rosenberg, and "feelings and needs" lists, and more. As with any art, these rudiments necessarily must be learned, practiced, understood, embodied and then let go of so as not to become rote and block creativity.

Six Ways to Check If An Allied Intervention Is Welcome

Article • 2 - 3 minutes • 7/2019
Article
2 - 3 minutes
7/2019
If we are in the dominant group, intervening to prevent violence or an "ouch" is a way to ally with marginalized folks. We can intervene to meet their needs, rather than our own. In other words, we can intervene without putting our experience at center stage. To that end, here are six ways to ask if an intervention is welcome.

Expressing Ourselves Honestly

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: Be aware of opportunities to be honest holding the intention to connect with people. If you do this with the elements of brevity, directness, and respect, you can increase your chances of being heard. If they don't like your honesty, consider switching to empathizing with them by listening to their feelings and needs.

What Could I Say or Do When Someone Does Not Talk?

Trainer Tip • 1-2 minutes • 05/20/2005
Trainer Tip
1-2 minutes
05/20/2005
Can you give me advice on what to do when people won't talk to me? I find it very difficult to discover what their needs are that aren't being met! Also, how can I be effective with people who don't actually want to think about why they're being the way they are?

Acknowledging Other People’s Reality

Trainer Tip • 1-2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1-2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: Even if we don't agree, acknowledging others' realities can help demonstrate that we're including their feelings and needs in the conversation. Creating space for your reality and theirs can also bring a sense of connection, understanding, inclusion, abundance and fullness in life. Try it today. Read on for an example.

It’s All About Please and Thank You

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: People’s choice of words may be difficult to hear. In fact, we may feel downright aggravated by them. Whether we enjoy these statements or not, we can begin to recognize that behind each statement is a desire to meet needs, either by saying please or thank you. In this way, we are more likely to feel compassion because we have connected to their humanness. Listen for the please or...

Creating Your Experience

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer Tip: Only after we connect to our unmet need can we make sound decisions that will transform our experience. For example, if you feel bored, connect to your unmet needs (eg. need for understanding the relevance, etc) and then look for strategies that will meet them (eg. ask the speaker how this topic relates to our lives).