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Acknowledging Other People’s Reality

Trainer Tip •  1-2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1-2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Even if we don't agree, acknowledging others' realities can help demonstrate that we're including their feelings and needs in the conversation. Creating space for your reality and theirs can also bring a sense of connection, understanding, inclusion, abundance and fullness in life. Try it today. Read on for an example.


Timing of a request

Trainer Tip •  1-2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1-2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Stating our observations, feelings and needs can still be heard as criticism if we don't follow it up right away with a specific, doable request. Ending your statement with a request for what you want can clarify the situation and reduce the chances that you'll be met with defensiveness. Read on for an example.


Differentiating Needs from Strategies

Trainer Tip •  2 - 3 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes

Trainer tip: When we focus on needs further possibilities are more likely to open up. When we focus on a particular strategy, our world can feel scarce and conflicts can arise. Resolution comes when we value everyone’s needs and seek mutually satisfying solutions. We can ask for support towards this outcome.


How to Express Feelings

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer tip: Feelings of hurt, anger, fear, and resentment can often sound alike. Fear and excitement have the same physiological effects on us, and are often expressed in the same body language. Clearly and specifically naming our emotions and the intensity level can help us resolve conflicts, with a much greater opportunity to get our needs met.


A Focus on Needs

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

There are endless ways to meet our needs. Conflict occurs when we argue over strategies. When we actively value everyone’s needs, we foster openness and deeper connection in our relationships. Today look for opportunities to focus on needs in order to resolve an issue with at least one person.


Defining Needs

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

In NVC we define needs as resources that life requires to sustain itself. All human beings have the same needs. The strategy is what we do to meet that need. Strategies are specific; we all choose unique ways to meet our needs. The more we can see the difference between the two, the more likely we are to resolve conflicts with ease. Today, look for opportunities to notice the difference in the given situation.


Transforming Complaint

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: NVC-based social change naturally emerges from “a certain kind of spirituality”, a quality of spiritual clarity. Intuitions and impulses arising from spiritual clarity are more likely to support sustainable systems. Read on for how to bring more of this in, and ways to transform your complaint into commitment.


Hearing The Yes Behind The No

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer tip: It's often easy for us to hear rejection when someone says “no” to us. If we focus on the rejection, we may feel hurt and fail to take the time to understand what is going on with them. However, if we focus on their feelings and needs, we're more likely to uncover what they want and what prevents them. To increase success in resolving conflicts and find solutions that work for everyone, hear the “yes” behind their "no".


Connection, Connection, Connection

Trainer Tip •  2 - 3 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes

Trainer tip: Do you get into “right fights”? You know you’re in one when you’re arguing with somebody in order to be right or because you want to win. What needs do I hope to meet from winning or being right? Notice if you enter into a right fight today and shift your focus to your needs and connecting with the other person's needs.


Navigating Tense Conversations

Trainer Tip •  2 - 3 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes

Trainer Tip: Here are some options for tense moments in conversations: try a "redo", understand and recognize your habits, pause to regroup, empathize with the person so they feel heard, check your mind frame before speaking, and name some appreciations about one another.


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