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Library Resources with misunderstanding

When conflict or criticism occurs, we can notice two layers of meaning to create connection: the content and the needs the speaker is holding. When we are able to recognize this --and ideally engage open-heartedly, with curiosity, make clear requests, imagining what they want, no matter how their expression was framed -- we have more opportunity to support the longevity of our relationships, and to decrease our loneliness when together.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration 5 - 7 minutes
  • Date Added 05/2020
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Roxy Manning
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles

Misunderstandings can be painful. We can easily avoid this by checking what the other person understood from what we said, and ask the other person to do the same. Doing this is especially important when it comes to planning, shared decision-making, and when emotions are strong. Also, the more someone knows you, the more they think they already know what you mean -- which can get in the way of really hearing you. Here are a variety of ways to approach this simple strategy.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration 2-3 minutes
  • Date Added 8/2019
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee LaShelle Lowe-Charde
  • Points 1
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles

Working for racial justice is a shift in perspective—a shift in understanding and empathy that leads to a change in our actions: to listen instead of talk, to follow instead of lead, to yield rather than dominate. And to accept that I will continue to mess up. Part of working to undo racism is having the humility to know when our own understanding is limited. Read on for more this, and how it relates to meditation -- plus personal and collective liberation.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level All Skill Levels
  • Duration 5 - 8 minutes
  • Date Added 06/2020
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Oren Jay Sofer
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Articles

Trainer tip: People often presume why something happened before checking with the other person. Instead, if we were to name the facts of what happened through observation without adding in our own judgments or reasons why we think it happened, we can more easily open the possibility for deeper connection with the other person. Read on for more on making observations.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Introductory Skill Level
  • Duration 1 - 2 minutes
  • Date Added 10/2005
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Mary Mackenzie
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips

Trainer Tip: We all see through our own filters. To disentangle what we hear from some is really saying, check using understanding requests at the level of detail you need. Course correct along the way. In a charged situation this can be critical to bringing in clarity, being heard and resolving differences amicably.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration 1 - 2 minutes
  • Date Added 10/2005
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Mary Mackenzie
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1
Published in Trainer Tips