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Perceiving Reality

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: When we try to make another person fit into a reality that we prefer in order to meet our own needs everyone suffers. Instead, bring your focus back to yourself. Notice which of your needs are met or unmet when you spend time with someone. Don’t judge them; just focus on your feelings and needs. Then, decide whether continuing the relationship will meet them


Honesty as a Means to Connect

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Notice an opportunity today to use honesty as a means to connect with someone else. Consider what type of honesty might stimulate pain in others.


It’s All About Please and Thank You

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: People’s choice of words may be difficult to hear. In fact, we may feel downright aggravated by them. Whether we enjoy these statements or not, we can begin to recognize that behind each statement is a desire to meet needs, either by saying please or thank you. In this way, we are more likely to feel compassion because we have connected to their humanness. Listen for the please or thank you in your conversations today.


Mediating Conflicts

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: When there's conflict if you set the intention to connect and build trust first, you're more likely to move towards resolution. This can be built through offering reflections that captures essence of what's important to each party. Once connection and trust is established, then begin the process of creating strategies and solutions.


Receiving Appreciation With Grace

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: If we're deflecting an appreciation or letting it expand our ego, we're missing a chance to truly connect to what's important. A more satisfying way to receive appreciation is to connect to how we've contributed to another person’s life, rather than our own.


Punitive Use of Force

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: What is motivating your (in)actions? Are you doing something in the name of supporting deeper heartfelt needs, free of judgement or blame? Or are you bringing in consequences based on viewing the other person as having "bad behaviour"?


Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: When someone is unresponsive it can be an opportunity to bring in more presence and connection through empathy. They may be worried that if they speak they'll say something they'll regret. Or they may want to know that their needs matters as much as yours. They may also need more space to clarify their thoughts.


We Don’t Need to Fix Other People

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: The very process of giving someone space to talk about their issue without our judgment, to be truly understood by us, and to be deeply heard is very healing, enough so that most people will organically find their own creative ways to resolve their issues. Rely on this process and you will lose all desire to fix people’s problems. Try this out today.


Releasing Our Judgments

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: It's impossible to value other people’s needs and remain compassionate if we simultaneously harbor judgments. If we're willing to shift this behavior we can translate our judgments into acknowledging how something affects us. Once I got into the habit of this, my judgments began to subside dramatically. It became easy to love people and feel compassion for them, and I experienced a freedom I had never known before.


Making Sure We Are Heard

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: We all see through our own filters. To disentangle what we hear from some is really saying, check using understanding requests at the level of detail you need. Course correct along the way. In a charged situation this can be critical to bringing in clarity, being heard and resolving differences amicably.


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