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Enemy Images

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer tip: Judging others can affect our ability to communicate effectively with that person, or enjoy the relationship. Translating the static judgments (enemy images) we have of others into our own and others' feelings and needs can help us move into greater understanding, healing, and relief -- which can foster compassion and connection. Read on for more.


Bringing a Dead Conversation Back to Life

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Make a boring or "dead" conversation more interesting, meaningful and connecting. You can do this by connecting to the other person’s feelings, passions or desires. Read on for examples.


Change Your Thoughts to Change Your World

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Changing your thoughts can change the way people experience you. Just for today, see if you can notice when you have judgmental thoughts about yourself or other people. Then look to translate those thoughts into your feelings and needs. Read on for an example of how this works.


Become Willing to Express Appreciation

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: If someone has enriched your life (or moment) in some way, consider telling them about it. Your appreciation might be just the gift they need to contribute to brightening their day.


Evaluating Ourselves with Compassion

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Every time you criticize yourself, you cause yourself to feel shame and guilt, which promotes depression and stagnation. Instead, bringing in more self compassion can increase opportunities for change. Do this by acknowledging your needs (or values) that aren’t met by your actions. Read on for how to do this.


Being the Change We Seek

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Is there something you would like more of in your life right now? Try not to look to other people to provide the kind of experiences you want. Can you think of a way that you can be the change you seek? See if responding to the people the way you would want them to respond to you shifts something. Read on for an example of how.


Honesty Is the Key

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: In Nonviolent Communication, we see expressing honesty as a gift of our authenticity, and a chance for others to support us in getting our needs met -- this can flourish and deepen our relationships. We can notice and act on opportunities to be honest with the components of OFNR (Observations, Feelings, Needs, and Requests).


Empathy vs. Sympathy

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: When we sympathize, we relate an aspect of someone’s story to ourselves. When we empathize, we reflect the feelings and needs of the other. Empathy helps people connect more deeply to their own and another’s pain, and helps resolve issues with clarity and ease. Notice when you're giving someone sympathy rather than empathy.


Making Demands

Trainer Tip •  1 - 2 minutes • 
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

When we ask something of a person and threaten negative repercussions if she doesn’t comply, we're making a demand. Demands limit the possible responses and reduce joyful participation. Instead, look to find mutually satisfying resolutions. And look for ways to change your demand into a request. Read on for more.


Taking Responsibility for Meeting Our Needs

Trainer Tip •  3 - 5 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Levels
Trainer Tip
3 - 5 minutes

This trainer tip suggests ways to transform blame in to personal power. He suggests having multiple sources of support and multiple pathways to achieving the outcome you want, to allow more room to hear a "no". Read on for more.


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