Eddie Zacapa
CNVC Certified Trainer from Sacramento, California, USA
Eddie Zacapa is the co-founder of Life Enriching Communication (www.lecworks.org) and a certified trainer with the Center for Nonviolent Communication (CNVC). He has facilitated nonviolent communication workshops, trainings and programs with individuals, families, parents, schools, and organizations and worked in the domestic violence field for over 19 years.
Eddie is the author of Principles and Practices of Nonviolence: 30 Meditations for Practicing Compassion and Essentials for Cultivating Passionate Volunteers and Leaders: Guidelines for Organizations that Value Connection.
He also offers coaching to executives and managers and helps volunteers and employees discover their full potential on the job. He has worked with volunteersfor over 20 years with various non-profit organizations providing volunteer management.
He lives in Sacramento, CA with his family. He earned a Bachelor of Science degree in Journalism from San Jose State University and aBachelor of Science degree in Bible and Theology from William Jessup University. You may contact Eddie at eddie@baynvc.org
Codependency occurs when others' behavior affects us in unhealthy ways and we get obsessed with controlling their behavior. For example, we may focus on other's needs while neglect what matters to us, and resent it. Or we may depend on others to rescue us from results of our actions. Or we may fix or rescue others' neglected responsibilities. Or we may make others responsible for our needs. Instead, notice your needs, what you can('t) change, and your priorities.
Praise may disconnect us from our own confidence, intrinsic motivation, or discernment. It may lead to perfectionism, people pleasing, codependency, a tendency to criticize others or fix others, and more. Instead, without evaluative words we can sincerely share what we specifically liked about what they did, and what needs were met for us.
This sheet lists and describes 13 life serving strategies, such as: Time out, disengage, honesty check, and engaging in a working recovery plan. Read on for more.
This trainer tip suggests ways to transform blame in to personal power. He suggests having multiple sources of support and multiple pathways to achieving the outcome you want, to allow more room to hear a "no". Read on for more.
For us to open the door to seemlingly impossible societal changes, we need to find and transform enemy images in order to influence and collaborate with those who seem to be standing in our way. Here's an anecdote to show that this is what lead to Martin Luther King Jr's success in creating social change.
If we befriend our fear we cannot be paralyzed by it. Every fear that arises is a moment to increase our capacity. Fear is connected to something that is precious to us. We also can see what we do to numb our pain and how we try to avoid it. This knowledge can help us to choose healthier strategies to deal with our fears.
In pandemic many are asked to stay home. If we are experiencing violence at home we're also most at risk of harm or death if we leave. There are also less visible pieces at work. In this situation, acknowledging our pain, needs and experience can lighten the internal load to meet what is real, and claim our truth. We can do the same for our kids. This can open more pathways forward, and provide strength to leave when its more viable.