NVC Library

10 Things White People Can Do to Work for Racial Justice

Article • Read time:7 - 11 minutes
All Skill Levels
Article
Read time:7 - 11 minutes
It’s essential to give ourselves time to grapple with the complex feelings surrounding the brutality of state-sanctioned racism and violence. But if all we do is reflect and attend to our emotions we fail to show up, where and when it counts. So let's not perpetuate the violence by standing idly. Instead, here's ten things you can do to move into concrete action to address the continued, untenable, and horrific violence of racism. A list of resources is included.

How can Nonviolent Communication (NVC) Be Helpful in These Transformative Times?

Article • 23 - 34 minutes
All Skill Levels
Article
23 - 34 minutes
Amidst racial violence, there are things that NVC can offer. And there are places where NVC culture needs to be more vigilant. Here are examples of where, amidst incredible loss and pain, "allies" and communities commonly (and often unknowingly) create false equivalences, minimization and re-injure those who've been historically marginalized -- even when they offer empathy, or aim to stay "safe". Read on to cultivate greater understanding and ways to respond differently.

Four Questions to Ask Yourself Before Important Conversations

Article • 5 - 8 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
What's my intention? What needs am I trying to meet? What do I want the other person to know or understand? How can I say it in a way they are most likely to hear? These are four questions we can use in preparation for an important conversation. Read on for more on this, plus four accompanying practices.

Transformative Dialogue

Article • N/A
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
N/A
The less blame and criticism, the easier it is for others to hear us. From this perspective, it’s in our best interest to come from curiosity and care. This way differences can bring us together and help us know one another. The more mutual understanding, the easier it is to work together and find creative solutions. Read on for more on this, with a story about how a black man inspired 200 members of the KKK to leave the organization.

Moving Beyond Needs as Met or Unmet

Article • 5 - 8 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
Sometimes when we regard needs as something that could be met or unmet by another person or by a situation we unconsciously hold the belief that our needs should be met. Or we end up holding blame or implying wrongdoing. People are more likely to resist a request made from this stance. Instead, here are practices to increasingly losen any remaining attachment or demand energy -- and open our hearts to ourselves and others while we make requests.

Finding Security in the Face of Fear

Article • 4-6 minutes
All Skill Levels
Article
4-6 minutes
In pandemic we can notice where we seek security. For some, financial systems that seemed to offer security have suddenly become unpredictable. For others, living without such privilege, resources are even more difficult to access. And we become more vulnerable to illness and death. These changes can trigger fear, but also motivate choices that contribute to a sense of security. Read on for more.

Self Responsibility

Article • 6 - 9 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
6 - 9 minutes
Being self-responsible is about empowerment — via noticing what is potentially in our locus of control, getting to know ourselves better, looking at our own role in how we experience life, and making conscious choices to act within our own power. This requires us to be mindful in relating our stories to our needs. Read on for more on this, and the various pifalls within thinking about self responsibility.

The Jackal as a Teacher

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes
Introductory Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes

Trainer tip: Why do NVC practitioners sometimes use the jackal as a metaphor in the NVC world? What can it teach us? Read on for more.


How to Set Boundaries Early and Often

Article • 5-8 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
5-8 minutes
Using the example of being met with chronic lateness, here are three steps to setting boundaries early in a dating situation or relationship.

Emerging: Practicing Awareness of Emergence

Trainer Tip • 3 - 5 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
3 - 5 minutes

This exercise explains four stages of the "Need Cycle": Fulfilled, Emerging, Urgent, Satisfying. It asks us to consider, connect and identify needs, feelings and where we are in the Need Cycle. Then it prompts us to remain mindful of the need for sustenance as we move through the cycle, noticing the subtle shifts in your physical sensations and emotions.


 
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