NVC Multimedia Library

It’s All About Please and Thank You

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Trainer Tip  •  Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: People’s choice of words may be difficult to hear. In fact, we may feel downright aggravated by them. Whether we enjoy these statements or not, we can begin to recognize that behind each statement is a desire to meet needs, either by saying please or thank you. In this way, we are more likely to feel compassion because we have connected to their humanness. Listen for the please or thank you in your conversations today.
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Practicing Non-Reactivity

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Article  •  Read time: 3 - 5 minutes
For this practice assume that reactivity is arising any time you are distracted and not enjoying something. Practice throughout the day by focusing for a few moments on something specific that you find pleasing. Notice the sensation of joy or pleasure in your body, and hold attention there longer than usual. This interrupts tension and contraction. Keep remembering to do this. When you go too long without directing your attention in this way, the practice becomes less accessible.
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Mediating Conflicts

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Trainer Tip  •  Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: When there's conflict if you set the intention to connect and build trust first, you're more likely to move towards resolution. This can be built through offering reflections that captures essence of what's important to each party. Once connection and trust is established, then begin the process of creating strategies and solutions.
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Self-Empathy: Healing from the Inside Out (Complete Course)

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All Skill Levels  •  Audio  •  5 - 7 hours

Ever wish you knew how you might experience more choice when you've been triggered, instead of being trapped in old habits and unmet needs? Wish you could REALLY heal old internal messages that tell you you're not good enough… not loveable… or not deserving? Join veteran CNVC Certified Trainer, Mary Mackenzie, for this 6-session course designed to deepen your ability to connect with self and heal your past through the process of Self-empathy.

The first session of this course is available for all to listen to and enjoy:

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Receiving Appreciation With Grace

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Trainer Tip  •  Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: If we're deflecting an appreciation or letting it expand our ego, we're missing a chance to truly connect to what's important. A more satisfying way to receive appreciation is to connect to how we've contributed to another person’s life, rather than our own.
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When You Are Being "Talked At"

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Article  •  Read time: 5 - 8 minutes
Has someone ever talked to you to the extent that you're no longer enjoying it, and you now wonder if they even know you're there? Learn ways to bring in emotional understanding, engage more honestly and open-heartedly, and bridge next steps to the type of conversation that engages everyone's needs.
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Punitive Use of Force

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Trainer Tip  •  Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: What is motivating your (in)actions? Are you doing something in the name of supporting deeper heartfelt needs, free of judgement or blame? Or are you bringing in consequences based on viewing the other person as having "bad behaviour"?
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Using an Anchor in Self Empathy

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Article  •  Read time: 5 - 8 minutes
An anchor awakens parts of you that can access a bigger perspective. It calms and helps you engage presence for greater access to your skills. Also, it can reduce your reactivity, increase conscious relating, and support self-compassion. An anchor helps you get a little bit bigger than the reactivity you are experiencing so that you can access a wiser discernment. It is simple, and can be done anytime and anywhere. Learn more about how to develop your anchor in self-empathy.
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Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Trainer Tip  •  Read time: 1-2 minutes
Trainer Tip: When someone is unresponsive it can be an opportunity to bring in more presence and connection through empathy. They may be worried that if they speak they'll say something they'll regret. Or they may want to know that their needs matters as much as yours. They may also need more space to clarify their thoughts.
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From Awareness to Action: Creating Bridges Across Differences (2017 Telethon)

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Beginner Skill Level  •  Video  •  40 minutes

Finding ways of connecting across differences can be challenging and confusing — Join Roxanne Manning for an exploration and discussion of the concepts she's found helpful for navigating these kinds of difficult situations and enrich your life!

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Connection Central: Nonviolent Communication Articles (NVC)
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