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NVC Resources on Demands


When Hearing A “No”: Demanding Versus Persisting

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes • 12/02/2021
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
12/02/2021
Trainer Tip: When they say "no", acknowledge what people are saying "yes" to. From there, you persist towards a resolution that values both party's needs, without demand. Persisting is when we try to meet needs by continuing to connect with another. Demanding is when we insist someone do something, or else face negative repercussions. Showing care and willingness to work with people can help...

Making Demands

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
When we ask something of a person and threaten negative repercussions if she doesn’t comply, we're making a demand. Demands limit the possible responses and reduce joyful participation. Instead, look to find mutually satisfying resolutions. And look for ways to change your demand into a request. Read on for more.

Demands vs Requests

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
10/2005
Trainer tip: Demands are more likely to limit the possibilities and create distance between people. The trick to asking something as a request is valuing everyone’s needs equally. When you value everyone’s needs equally, then you are more willing to come to solutions that satisfy everyone. It thus opens possibilities and helps build connection.

Foundational NVC Skills: Requests

Audio • 1 hour, 25 minutes • 11/15/2010
Audio
1 hour, 25 minutes
11/15/2010
Marshall Rosenberg suggests that there are two requests that are the most transformative to relationships, (1) What’s alive in both of us? and (2) What would make life more wonderful for both of us? This telecourse recording offers an easy-to-digest overview of how carefully crafted requests inspire joyful relationships.