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NVC Resources on Interdependence


Interdependence in Action: How to Change Agreements with Care

Article • 13 - 19 minutes • 1/2019
Article
13 - 19 minutes
1/2019
The awareness and practice of interdependence is integral to holding an NVC consciousness. Practicing interdependence also means bringing in a quality of care in the moments we want to change agreements with others. This article talks about where our various choices, in regards to changing agreements, fits into different levels of engaging our interdependence.

Independence vs. Interdependence in NVC

Article • 3 - 5 minutes • 08/2020
Article
3 - 5 minutes
08/2020
For us to have a more peaceful world and relationships, growing our skills to engage interdependently is key. An interdependence-oriented person may choose to attend to both inner factors and outer factors that affect their own and others' experiences. Unfortunately, this is likely to be misunderstood by independence-oriented people as enmeshment -- and this is where conflict emerges. Read on...

Life, Interdependence, and the Pursuit of Meeting Needs

Article • 9 - 13 minutes • 12/2017
Article
9 - 13 minutes
12/2017
The more we can support an interdependent flow of resources and energy in society and the economy, the greater we can increase both natural abundance and the chances of averting extinction. Accumulation is a strategy born of mistrust. It’s an attempt to control the flow of life to guarantee that we will have enough for the future. Accumulation and exchange has blocked this interdependent flow....

Interdependence vs. Dependence/Independence

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes • 10/2005
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
10/2005
Trainer tip: NVC consciousness recognizes interdependence. In this process each person is autonomous; everyone's needs matter; people have choice and responsibility for their actions; there's abundance, and a valuing of coming together. The dependence / independence paradigm assumes we either need someone else to be whole -- or we don’t need others at all. Commit to living autonomously. Notice...

The Powers No One Can Take Away From Us

Article • 16 - 24 minutes • 05/2019
Article
16 - 24 minutes
05/2019
We can choose our stories of interpretation, and how to respond. And while stories of self-sufficiency can (to a degree) give us more influence over our own lives, they don't erase oppression, war, nor climate change. When stories omit a lens that includes impacts of interdependence, oppression, and structural inequities, stories can also keep us disconnected and blocked from compassion for...

Holding Dilemmas Together in the Workplace

Article • 11 - 16 minutes • 2/2013
Article
11 - 16 minutes
2/2013
When we are transparent about our concerns, brainstorm solutions together, and look towards making a decision with the other person, we can increase understanding, partnership, and mutual support. This invites people to work on the same issue from the same direction, collaboratively seek solutions, and tap a deeper wisdom. In the end, the future survival of our species depends on this kind of...

Responding to the Call of Our Times - Mentoring, Teaching and Coaching with Miki Kashtan

Audio • 1 hour, 11 minutes • 02/17/2017
Audio
1 hour, 11 minutes
02/17/2017
Listen as Miki works with participants. Topics: how small requests serve interdependence; NVC process vs purpose; how to respond when empathy is used to create distance; coping with verbal aggression, and more!

Understanding Selfishness, Self-Responsibility, and Self-Care

Article • 6 - 9 minutes • 11/2020
Article
6 - 9 minutes
11/2020
What we refer to as "selfishness" is action taken without concern for the impact or cost of that action. Self-responsibility, on the other hand, includes actively living from the truth of interdependence, care for your and others needs, thriving of all, and more. We can access clarity of self care when we have open flexibility, curiosity, and responsiveness. Read on for more on the indicators...

The Shadow Side of Autonomy

Article • 8 - 12 minutes • 01/2018
Article
8 - 12 minutes
01/2018
Could our "need for autonomy" be getting in the way of "partnership consciousness" (as NVC is sometimes called). Could "autonomy" also block healthy relationships with not only ourselves and with others, but also with the planet? This article invites us to consider how "autonomy" may colour our NVC practice at the peril of our critical values. Values such as our care for impact, shared...

Why Do I Feel Depressed?

Article • 7 - 11 minutes • 04/2018
Article
7 - 11 minutes
04/2018
When does identifying our or others' needs become a coping mechanism that hides the real problems that go unaddressed, and thereby reinforcing problems? This article zooms out to take a look at how dealing with our needs in the absence of the larger picture can inadvertertly support unhealthy ways of operating, rather than become a healthy solution. It asks us to see what could be hidden --...

Fear of Negative Consequences

Audio • 8 minutes • 03/04/2016
Audio
8 minutes
03/04/2016
Miki responds to a participant’s question concerning fear of consequences when speaking with a manager at work. In this excerpt, she delves into the topic of choosing to inhabit nonviolence in the workplace, affirming that fear and nonviolence are incompatible, and that nonviolence is a powerful alternative to our habitual Fight, Flight, Freeze responses.