Excellence in online learning since 2006
NVC Library

Search the Library

Search the Library

Search the Library

NVC Resources on Trust



Not Trusting the “Yes”

Audio • 24 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
24 minutes
In this audio recording, Miki demonstrates how to stay in a dialogue when you don't trust someone's "yes," how to equalize power between people and how to allow space for others to say "no" to our requests. In this 2-part audio series, Miki demonstrates how to stay in a dialogue when you don’t trust someone’s “yes,” how to equalize power between people and how to allow space for others to say...

Building Trust

Article • 3 - 5 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3 - 5 minutes
How is trust best supported? Do you know what you do to contribute to making it easier or more difficult for others to express the truth (even in the most mundane moments)? Smaller requests can also built trust over time if they're rooted in the present moment, and are specific enough. Learn more about building trust...

Mediating Conflicts

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
Trainer Tip: When there's conflict if you set the intention to connect and build trust first, you're more likely to move towards resolution. This can be built through offering reflections that captures essence of what's important to each party. Once connection and trust is established, then begin the process of creating strategies and solutions.

Healing From Betrayal

Article • 5- 8 minutes
All Skill Levels
Article
5- 8 minutes
Repairing betrayal may include rebuilding self trust, getting support, empathy on both sides over time, and new agreements. Even though your (in)actions don't "cause" someone's behavior, acknowledging any part you played in creating conditions for the behaviors to arise, can support repair. Trust builds slowly as new skills, ways of relating and experiences that reflect honesty, self...

Differentiating Between Feelings And Faux Feelings

Learning Tool • N/A
Introductory Skill Level
Learning Tool
N/A
This chart is intended as an aid to translating words that are often confused with feelings. These words imply that someone is doing something to you and generally connote wrongness or blame. To use this list, when somebody says “I’m feeling rejected,” you might translate this as: “Are you feeling scared because you have a need for inclusion?”

Creating an Internal Secure Base

Article • 5 - 8 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
We each hold an internal model or set of expectations about how caring and comfort could be accessed in relationship. The ability to reflect upon and challenge our own dominant model of perceptions, beliefs, and behaviors --and to experience discomfort and vulnerability-- is a key feature of "security". If not, an "attachment reactivity" arises -- where sense of insecurity, separateness, and...

Opening to Intimacy

Trainer Tip • 2 - 3 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
2 - 3 minutes
Trainer tip: Do you have behavioral patterns that block intimacy? When we are feeling our most vulnerable, we often want intimacy but also tend to keep it at bay. Acknowledge your need for intimacy, and find people you can trust to love you as you are.

The Basics of Partnership Parenting Using NVC (6 Session Course)

Audio • 7 hours, 29 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Audio
7 hours, 29 minutes
As parents, we often face challenging situations on a daily basis and struggle to create what we most long for. In this 6 session telecourse recording, you will learn how Nonviolent Communication can support a family culture where cooperation, trust, and peace are nurtured, and children and parents can flourish together.

Bridging the Gap: Practical Support for Parents of Grown Sons and Daughters (4 Session Course)

Audio • 4 - 6 hours
Intermediate Skill Level
Audio
4 - 6 hours
Learn tools to help you reconnect and repair your relationship with your adult children. Whether the issues are estrangement, lack of trust, conflict, dependence, miscommunication or any other challenge that impacts you with your grown sons and daughters, your heart will find comfort and ease through this course. The first session of this course is available for all to listen to and enjoy.

Empathy in the Face of Powerful Structures

Article • 12 - 18 minutes
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
12 - 18 minutes
Here's an inspiring story of one citizen (the author) who faced a police officer and judge in court to contest a transit ticket... and inspired structural changes in the way one aspect of New York City transit operates. She inspires change with her application of empathy for self and others, acknowledgement, connecting requests -- and an inspiring vision of understanding, shared reality and...

Honor Your Need to be Heard

Article • 2-3 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
2-3 minutes
When you want to be heard, first check if your listener is available. This honors yourself, and the other person’s choice about listening. You need to be clear about wanting a particular quality of listening, and that you are willing to wait if that isn’t available in the moment. Read on for how to ask for listening in a way that can build trust that your request isn't a demand.

Empathy vs. Investigation

Article • 4-6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
4-6 minutes
To tell the difference between empathy and investigation, watch for distinctions along four different dimensions: energy, subject, intention and trust. These distinctions can help us engage awareness and skill to meet your needs and respond to others’ needs in more direct ways. The more you meet your needs in conscious and direct ways, the more present you can be for others. Read on for more...

What About Psychopaths?

Article • 4 - 6 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes
Sometimes we want to avoid placing our love and trust in someone, to protect our hearts and our life energies. And so there are deeper questions that we can use to check whether we're in relationship with someone who doesn't have capacity to be in relationship with us (eg. “Do I have a sense of mattering in this relationship?”). Read on for more questions we use to assess our empathy and...

The Three Most Common Pitfalls in Nonviolent Communication

Article • 5 - 8 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Article
5 - 8 minutes
We're more likely to sacrifice trust, connection, and relationship quality when (1.) We use NVC to focus on being seen, understood, heard, or meeting our own needs in a way that eclipses our view and understanding of others needs; (2.) We don't clearly examine our intentions; and (3.) We use the NVC form so rigidly that it becomes difficult for others to connect with us authentically.

Tips for the Road Series: Tip 4. Invite People to Say No

Trainer Tip • 1 - 2 minutes
Beginner Skill Level
Trainer Tip
1 - 2 minutes
When asking for support from another, you are most likely to enjoy receiving that support when the person giving support is giving from the heart—from a place of joy or delight. Inviting them to say "no" is a way of encouraging an authentic response, a response you can trust more fully.

Life Force and the Spirituality of Human Needs (6 Session Course)

Audio • 6 - 9 hours
Beginner Skill Level
Audio
6 - 9 hours
Your needs and your values are your Life Force: the river that flows through your spirit and your life, giving life and light to your being. Explore this river with Robert, and map out routes that support your growth. Gain a deeper understadning and acceptance of the spirituality and beauty of needs and values. The first session of this course is available for all to listen to and enjoy.

"I'm Not Good Enough" and Other Leadership Myths

Article • 7-11 mins
All Skill Levels
Article
7-11 mins
Do you yearn to step forward in leadership, but know you're holding back? Clinical psychologist, organizational consultant, and speaker, Roxy Manning, PhD, shows us that more than external factors, its our internal beliefs and fears that provide the main barrier to moving forward. She does this by taking us through three myths of leadership, and weaves in anecdotes to illustrate how tapping our...

Healing and Reconciliation (7 Session Course)

Audio • 7 - 9 hours
Beginner Skill Level
Audio
7 - 9 hours
Old emotional hurts and pains can easily erupt when you’re in the throes of conflict – even if you’re the mediator. Wouldn’t it be lovely if you could avoid all of that, and instead create more peace and happiness for yourself, your family, your co-workers and your community? The introductory session of this course is available for all to listen to and enjoy: