Excellence in online learning since 2006

Needs: A Foundation of Inner Freedom, Empowerment and Peace

Article •  3 -5 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Article
3 -5 minutes

The human needs that we all share are the foundation of the Nonviolent Communication (NVC) process because it is in connecting to needs that we find inner freedom, empowerment and compassion.


What the World Needs

Article •  4 - 6 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Article
4 - 6 minutes

In this written transcript of a live presentation, Inbal Kashtan shares how she first became aware of poverty. She explains how empathy is a vital and powerful force for creating peace in our world today, and a powerful means of creating a world that works for all of us.


Abusive Relationships and Nonviolence

Article •  8 - 12 minutes • 
Intermediate Skill Levels
Article
8 - 12 minutes

In order to bring in more nonviolence into the world, we need to take our own needs seriously and recognize that no amount of seeing someone’s innocence would mean putting up with more of their harmful behavior. We need to disentangle compassion towards another from the willingness to tolerate more harmful actions. At times this means finding enough self-love, support, or clarity, to take decisive action. Read on for more.


How Do I Love Those Who Hate Me?

Article •  6 - 9 minutes • 
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
6 - 9 minutes

There are times when someone judges us, or meets us with prejudice, and its easier for us to respond by hating them, or judging ourselves as not good enough. How can we love another person instead without excusing their actions? Roxy tells us her story with wonderment, grief and mourning.


Connection Requests: Motivations and Examples Article

Article •  6 - 9 minutes • 
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
6 - 9 minutes

 Connection requests focus on the quality of connection between people instead of on any particular strategy or solution. While the core motivation for a connection request may be connection with the other person, varied internal states and needs may help guide us toward different types of connection requests. Self-connection and understanding of our motivation in making a connection request can therefore greatly support our capacity for discovering and articulating what specifically we want from the other person that we believe may contribute to connection.


Celebrating Mourning

Article •  3 - 5 minutes • 
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
3 - 5 minutes

In a recent vacation in a Mexican village, I was surprised to find myself in the midst of a community in mourning. Two days before I came, a 21-year-old girl had died in a car accident. Everyone in the town knew her and was openly affected by her death.


The Price of Nice

Article •  12 - 16 minutes • 
Intermediate Skill Level
Article
12 - 16 minutes

Have you been nice? Well then you must be enjoying the reward: depression, intermittent explosiveness, job meaninglessness, ambiguous anxiety, low resentment and subtle self hate. The antidotes: honesty, passion and compassion.


Using Therapeutic Communication to Connect with Patients

Article •  7 - 10 minutes • 
Advanced Skill Level
Article
7 - 10 minutes

"I was taught in Nursing School that when someone expressed a feeling to reflect it back. I tried this technique in the room of a patient who had just received a diagnosis of cancer."


Moving Towards Life-Serving Responsibility in NVC

Article •  11 - 26 minutes • 
Beginner Skill Level
Article
11 - 26 minutes

In the "obnoxious stage" we care for our needs in a way that doesn't respect others' needs. In the "emotional liberation" stage we fully care for others' needs as much as our own—while being free of fear, guilt, shame, or obligation. Often NVC training teaches us how to achieve the latter stage without the former. For greater compassion we can be more rigorous in how we talk about “responsibility", impacts and interdependence.


Blame, Responsibility, And Care

Article •  11 - 16 minutes • 
Advanced Skill Level
Article
11 - 16 minutes
One NVC principle is "stimulus vs cause" - one may be the stimulus but never the cause of another's feelings. When we're upset this principle can help us express pain without blame. However, when others are upset it's easy to slip into blaming them using this principle. Instead, we can hear their pain with care and heartfelt mourning - without guilt nor defensiveness, and whether or not we agree. All this is important if we're sincerely applying compassion. Read on for more.

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