There are various ways to be known. Learn how to engage and make clear requests accordingly. This includes getting clear in yourself about what exactly you want known; communicating how important it is to you; sharing examples in your life of being known; requesting and negotiating from the energy of the met need; letting the other person know whether or not the relationship is really sustainable for you if the need goes unmet long-term; and checking the other person's capacity.
There are three things you can do to sort inner conflict and make doable, sustainable agreements with yourself. This capacity can build trust with yourself to follow through, and to develop diverse and creative solutions -- thereby increasing confidence and ease.