Trainer Tip: One of the swiftest ways to close our hearts is having judgmental thinking or looking to get our way. How open are you when you’re in this mode? The goal in peaceful living is to approach our relationships with an open heart. Start conversations today with an intention to connect with other people.

Trainer Tip: Overwhelmed with all that you want to do? If so, what are you working to change? Is it a behavior or a consciousness? Where were you with this issue when you first decided to create change? And now where are you? Celebrating your progress can encourage you to keep trying. You wouldn’t expect to jump on a treadmill and jog three miles the first time. Don't have the same expectations...

Trainer Tip: When we feel resentment toward others, we are harming our own emotional health. Surprisingly, when we own up to our part of an uncomfortable situation, we can release the pain and resentment. Such honesty can provide healing. Read on for a related anecdote of how this can play out.

Trainer Tip: We feel our freedom when we are willing to look at others’ needs and our own, evaluate all of them and work toward valuing everyone’s needs. Take the time to demonstrate that you value everyone’s needs as much as your own today.

Trainer Tip: On a scale of 1 to 10, how is your emotional bank account? If it’s lower than you like, consider what you can do right now to bring it closer to balance. Everyone in your life, and most especially you, will benefit from this. Even 15 mins of empathy may nourish you with accompaniment and perspective, even when the issues or circumstances in your life are the same.

Trainer Tip: If you're doing personal growth work, and changing your behaviors, you may find yourself wanting others to join your efforts with similar levels of enthusiasm. When they don't do so, you may feel frustrated and place judgments on them, thinking they aren't as caring. You'll be less likely to feel disappointed in people if you remind yourself that when you do personal growth work,...

Trainer Tip: Even if we don't agree, acknowledging others' realities can help demonstrate that we're including their feelings and needs in the conversation. Creating space for your reality and theirs can also bring a sense of connection, understanding, inclusion, abundance and fullness in life. Try it today. Read on for an example.

It's important to make requests specific and doable. Also, without a swift request immediately after we state our observation, feeling, and need in regard to the situation, the other person is left guessing what we want. Instead, a swift request can bring clarity and lessen the potential for the listener to become defensive or argue.

We all love to contribute to others’ lives. We love to offer support because it meets our own needs for contribution, love, caring, and making a difference. For today, admit that you love to support other people, and that you would like support yourself. Let at least one person contribute to your life today. Read on for a related story.

Anytime you create something new in your life, you can fulfill your need for creativity. Expand your concept of what it means to be creative. Read on for examples.

Do you ever give up on disagreements, temporarily or permanently? Do you ever disengage from conflict because you’re certain the situation can't be resolved? Sometimes this applies. And consider how you may be giving up too soon, which decreases the possibility for resolution. This speaks to your level of commitment. How committed are you to valuing another’s needs and to finding resolution?

We can ask for what we want but if we repeatedly don’t get it from one source, it's our responsibility to find a new way to get it. We don’t honor our relationships when we insist that people who are unavailable or unwilling to support us meet our needs. Read on for related a parable about a woman persistently asking to get milk from a hardware store.

When it comes to how you're achieving your goals, notice what you value. Is achievement coming at others' expense? Where is your sense of worth and validation derived from? Do other people in some way set the bar that you strive to surpass? Without comparing to other people, what does success mean to you? Read on for a related story.

Pay attention to when you're motivated by guilt, duty, obligation, shame, and worry. How do you feel? Does it bring up resentment, rebellion, submission, reactivity or resistance? When you're motivated by joy notice how that feels, and how others respond. Read on for a related story.

When we ask something of a person and threaten negative repercussions if she doesn’t comply, we're making a demand. Demands limit the possible responses and reduce joyful participation. Instead, look to find mutually satisfying resolutions. And look for ways to change your demand into a request. Read on for more.

In NVC we define needs as resources that life requires to sustain itself. All human beings have the same needs. The strategy is what we do to meet that need. Strategies are specific; we all choose unique ways to meet our needs. The more we can see the difference between the two, the more likely we are to resolve conflicts with ease. Today, look for opportunities to notice the difference in the...

When people get hurt or harmed, how can we restore trust, safety and connection in the community? A restorative approach which focuses on who got hurt and how can we restore it? Rather than whose fault is it and how can we punish them?

It's tempting to shut down a heated conversation when it’s painful and overwhelming. What can give us strength to stay open to hearing and being moved, to being open to new possibility, is recalling the “triad of conversation.” The triad is self and other and then awareness on the third side of the conversation. Here we can return to connection, to what we share and need in common, to a...

A lot of us picked up new hobbies and learning new things during the COVID lockdown. After recently posting a puzzle on Facebook, Shantigarbha ended up being delightfully surprised at the conversation it began around NVC in relation to learning and education. Watch the video to hear our tips and click see more for the solution to the padlock puzzle below. My solution to the padlock puzzle: 042...

Welcome to the final video in our 3 part Embodied NVC Life Hack series. So far we've learnt about rewiring our brain from a flight, fright or freeze reaction to the choice of self-empathy, allowing us to centre and check-in with ourselves. In part two, Empathy Skills, we went beyond self-empathy to look at ways we can empathise with the other person. In this final instalment, we create a bridge...