Browse the NVC Library

LoraKim explores what gets in the way of seeing the inherent worth and dignity of others when there is conflict in congregations. The strategies LoraKim offers can be applied to any spiritual community.

Self-compassion is essential for healing trauma and restoring your wholeness. It is also an antidote to reactivity and separation, allowing presence to emerge. In developing presence, you can become what the world needs most in these times of intensity and chaos. This work can strengthen your skills to be more fully in relationship with all that life offers while allowing your heart to be moved by what is alive in you and with others.

Trainer Tip: Accepting our true feelings, needs and values can lead us to a more compassionate life. Are you being true to yourself?

CNVC Certified Trainer Lore Baur asks: "Have you ever seen something happen that made you feel uncomfortable and you didn't know what to do?" That's the "bystander effect:" a well-researched and commonly experienced phenomenon. Training can help you overcome it, enabling you to discern what to do and how to support others in ways that reduce trauma and increase safety.

Ask the Trainer: Is it a good idea to use NVC on persistent guilt, anger or depression without the aid of others?

Sitting with not knowing is an NVC skill because its the opposite of reactivity. In our haste to find relief from the discomfort of not knowing, we often become defensive, jump to conclusions, and blame and criticize others. Sitting with not knowing requires us to suspend our distrust, tolerate fear and uncertainty - creating space within us. NVC provides a way forward to enter into a space of wonder, possibility, and creativity.

One of the premises in NVC is that behind all behavior and expressions are Universal Human Needs as the deeper motivators. And one of the key distinctions in NVC is that between Needs and Strategies. Try Alan Seid's exercise called  "Peeling the Layers of the Onion, " a process for uncovering these needs — the deeper motivations — that underlie words and behaviors we may find disturbing or puzzling.

Sylvia Haskvitz uses 20+ years of experience to introduce the core concepts of Nonviolent Communication, leaving you grounded in the basics and ready to make transformative improvements to the quality of your communication.

Trainer Tip: The change you're looking for begins with a single step.

Print-and-cut these 71 needs cards for one-on-one, partner or group activities, to help support the pratice of empathy. Includes nine blank cards for you to customize.