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With abundant evidence that most people have unconscious biases against people --even when that bias runs counter to their own values-- there's a strong chance you recreate this disconnect with people far more often than you recognize. So even with a high degree of NVC skills you may behave in a way that seems "NVC" but also reproduces the painful patterns that marginalized people all-too-often experience. Read on for ways to transform pitfalls of NVC into more reliable connection.

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Trainer Tip: Be aware of opportunities today to choose empathizing over arguing with someone who is angry, and notice how it affects your ability to resolve the situation. Read on for more.

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Trainer Tip

1 - 2 minutes

10/2005

Trainer Tip: Is there something you would like more of in your life right now? Try not to look to other people to provide the kind of experiences you want. Can you think of a way that you can be the change you seek? See if responding to the people the way you would want them to respond to you shifts something. Read on for an example of how.

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If you're unpleasantly triggered during the holidays you may find yourself responding in ways you don't like. Start by acknowledging how affected you are to bring in more curiosity, mindfulness and eventually, authentic and discerning choices.

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Listen to Miki talk about the value of participating in groups, recognizing our inherent nature to do so, how industrialization has hindered our skills and the value of participating in a time when it's most needed.

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Trainer Tip: Take a moment to consider feelings, our conditioning about expressing or even feeling emotion, and the value of re-evaluating our relationship to feelings.

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Trainer Tip

1-2 minutes

07/13/2022

The energy of the most private events of our lives (such as sex) can ripple out and affect everything we do, like the ripples of a rock thrown in a pond. Instead of segregating -or sometimes denying- parts of ourselves, we can bring our blind spots and our shadows in self and relationships into the light. Having growth in a private life can transfer onto other areas of life.

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Trainer Tip

1 - 2 minutes

02/13/2022

Trainer Tip: Overwhelmed with all that you want to do? If so, what are you working to change? Is it a behavior or a consciousness? Where were you with this issue when you first decided to create change? And now where are you? Celebrating your progress can encourage you to keep trying. You wouldn’t expect to jump on a treadmill and jog three miles the first time. Don't have the same expectations for your emotional fitness either!

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Practice Exercise

00:11 hours:minutes

02/08/2011

Join CNVC Certified Trainer and Certified Focusing Teacher Shulamit Berlevtov in this brief exercise called the Wheel of Awareness. This exercise will help you become aware of how to distinguish and differentiate your life experience.

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Giving feedback can be a difficult task, sometimes we try to avoid getting to the point and instead end up spending a long time attempting to communicate. We find there are mostly two types of feedback. The first focuses on what is wrong with the person's behaviour and tends to feel more judgemental whereas the second is values-based feedback, focusing on the needs of the people involved.

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