Browse the NVC Library

Eric offers us a list of some of his favorite books, articles, and videos related to building successful relationships.

What is it that we are taught we can’t have, and what is it that we are encouraged to pursue instead? This guide could help you see through what's hidden behind the curtain of our societal conditioning.

Trainer Tip: Sometimes when we look to fix someone's problems we think we're doing it to make them feel better, but in reality we are uncomfortable and we want to feel better. Instead of assuming you know what their problem is or what they need, listen deeply. Your listening presence can bring relief to the both of you and provide additional opportunities for healing. And along the way they may find their own way to a solution.

In this audio recording, Miki demonstrates how to stay in a dialogue when you don't trust someone's "yes," how to equalize power between people and how to allow space for others to say "no" to our requests.

In this brief introduction to The Work from Byron Katie, Arnina shows the connection of The Work to Nonviolent Communication. Arnina points out how the first two questions of The Work correspond to the observation step of the NVC process, and invites us into deeper self-inquiry.

Trainer Tip: When we acknowledge our met needs, rather than labeling the other person as good or bad, we achieve a clarity of mind that deepens our connection to ourselves and other people.

In parenting, Roxy Manning notes the tendency for self-judgment and external judgment. Roxy suggests that being a single parent or a working parent influences your ability to implement parenting strategies. The importance of assessing the feasibility of strategies in one's current life context is emphasized. Roxy encourages self-compassion and mourning the gap between desired and achievable outcomes. Her message encourages understanding personal constraints and practicing self-compassion in parenting.

NVC practice is based on several key assumptions and intentions. When we live based on these assumptions and intentions, self-connection and connection with others become increasingly possible and easy, helping us contribute to a world where everyone’s needs are attended to peacefully.

Do you want to increase your capacity to identify and connect with feelings and needs?  Would you like to enhance your ability to translate judgments? Join Miki for this deep dive into feelings and needs.

Sitting with not knowing is an NVC skill because its the opposite of reactivity. In our haste to find relief from the discomfort of not knowing, we often become defensive, jump to conclusions, and blame and criticize others. Sitting with not knowing requires us to suspend our distrust, tolerate fear and uncertainty - creating space within us. NVC provides a way forward to enter into a space of wonder, possibility, and creativity.