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How do you repair a relationship when you've already said things you regret, and want to reconnect with explaining or defending yourself? Listen as Miki Kashtan offers two valauble tips.

Transform arguments with these steps: take responsibility for your mind, increase your capacity for discomfort, slow down, show up and remember your values, offer understanding, take risks, and speak from your heart. Learning new skills takes time, energy and effort. However, it’s entirely possible to radically shift the way we communicate. The key is patience, persistence, and taking it one step at a time.

Building trust involves each person taking responsibility for what they want by identifying their needs, and making specific and doable requests that open a negotiation. Identify in what contexts you already have trust, what you want to be able to trust, and how you may be blocking or cultivating that trust. Making requests for specific actions of what to do differently can also help.

Trainer tip: In every interaction, we have a choice of responding in one of these four ways: judge/blame self, Judge/blame others, empathize with self, and/or empathize with others. The goal is to make a conscious choice about our response. Notice the choices you have when you receive someone’s communication today.

What would the world be like if there was flow between all of us based on "mutual giving from the heart"? Using examples, this article offers models for us to follow that could inspire us to treat our NVC practice as one of compassionate giving and receiving.

Listen to this 4-session telecourse recording with CNVC Certified Trainer, Hema Pokharna, PhD and her sister, Manda Pokharna, MD, and you will learn simple steps for transforming conflicts and mobilizing peace at home, at work and in the world.

Ask the Trainer: My question is about wanting to empathize more with my husband. Sometimes we connect very deeply, other times he slips back into "jackal talk..."